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Hi Roger. I really feel for you too. I've written elsewhere on the site - I feel my husband and I both have ADD (and some of our 3 kids as well). I am the one who researches ADD, seeks help, takes medication, etc. Just a few months ago, things seemed really bleak for me too - like I was literally buried by so many negatives in my life. I really felt hopeless. I will say that proper medication, continued research, and a wonderful counselor who also recognized anxiety in me have given me a new lease on life. It's wonderful having an advocate/cheerleader in my corner. The material she had me read, exercises she has had me practice, and the discussions we have make me realize "I'm worthy just because I exist. " I used to feel like such a victim, didn't assert myself, communicate my needs, grew inwardly resentful, etc. Now that I'm rebuilding my self-esteem, communicating more clearly with my husband and family (difficulties, needs, etc.), I'm actually hopeful again and am rediscovering who I used to be/my real strengths, etc. (my real dream is to be a published writer of cards, children's books, etc.). Bottom line, because I'm happier and more positive, my husband/family are too. I tell my husband I'm literally giddy. I think you really need a knowledgeable professional on your side - my counsellor also understands medications - you really need to treat depression/anxiety first so you can think clearly enough to advocate for yourself and address your ADD issues. I asked my primary care physician to recommend a good psychologist. Remember - you are worthy just because you exist. That statement alone started to turn my life around. I wish a recovery journey for you. Jen Koretsky's book/wesite/blog are great for folks who also have anxiety issues.