Recent Topics

  • by: Marie448 - 2 months 1 week ago

    I've been ready for years - we've been together for 16 years - and I know the mutually beneficial portion of our relationship ended at least 6 years ago. So I've been thinking about it for a long while and every time I come to this forum I vow to never be one of those who is writing this thread after 20, 30 or 40 years. But it just seems so unfair to my ADHD partner to leave. It's not like I'm perfect and trouble-free, so why not share our lives together til the end even if we drive each other nuts?

    I come to this forum and read every one else's horror stories and think I don't have it so bad. My partner doesn't have addictions or trouble with the law or difficulty holding a job, and we don't have kids so there is no issue there. But it is the anger and verbal abuse that I could really do without. I've never met someone who can get so angry over so little - he can even wake up angry. And being treated for ADHD isn't enough. He needs regular therapy but he will never get it. I've finally found a description for why I want to leave: death by a thousand cuts. I've started a list of all these little cuts I endure day after day. It helps me understand why I need to eventually leave. But because they are all so individually small and never big life-threatening gashes, it is so easy to move on, ignore, repress.

    Beyond the "death by a thousand cuts" issue, though, I realized today that I now know why there will always be conflict and discord in our relationship. It is a fundamental difference in perception that can't be explained, proven, avoided or synced. My partner calls it miscommunication, but it is so much more than words spoken and not heard or understood. It is the rate at which they are spoken, the surrounding noise both inside the brain and in the environment, the perceived tone, the many filters through which the words may be translated. I've been trying to tell him that the sky is blue when he so clearly sees that it is purple. No amount of explaining will ever convince him of even the possibility of the sky being blue or me seeing it that way, when he refuses to even accept the fact that his perception is so different than that of mine or likely most people, let alone consider how it might in fact sometimes be wrong. There is no point in continuing any conversation when it reaches this impasse. But his tenacity can't let anything go so easy. As exhausting and infuriating as this is for me, for him it is a magnitude so much greater I probably couldn't even hold my own weight up against it. Yet, he still doesn't stop trying and I wonder how much of that affects his actions and behaviors toward me. As much as I know I have resentment and hostility towards him, I wonder if he realizes he holds a lot for me as well. He would probably deny that as strongly as he denies that the sky might actually be blue.

    This is why, as much as I would love to break down all our behaviors and actions and pick and choose what we want to keep and what we want to get rid of, that would never be enough to bring peace to our relationship. I could ask him to please do not do behavior Y, and he could comply, but the underlying currents of speaking two different languages and having completely different world views, would still exist and still wear us down like water on rock, little by little every day.

  • by: pwcb11 - 2 months 1 week ago

    I have searched the internet on the topic of an ADHD parent and their impact on their children. There is plenty about ADHD & marriage but virtually nothing on how ADHD impacts children living with an ADHD parent. From my observation the impact is much like that on the nonADHD spouse, but much worse as children do not have the skills nor understanding on how to deal with the unwarranted anger, criticism and inconsistency in their lives. Has anyone out there found an online recourse or book that covers this topic. My daughter is suffering from living with her father (and me as well) and I do not know how to deal with this.  thanks.

  • by: JJamieson - 2 months 1 week ago

    This has become part of my daily existence and has now become my simple philosophy to follow on a daily basis.  It is my bible so to speak since it is such a simple set of rules to follow.  Having ADHD presents a different set of challenges for someone like me and one of them is getting mired down with too much information and being  easily overwhelmed by too much dogmatic thinking in general.  So many opinions, so many different ways to do things and so many different ways to see things?  What is right and what is wrong?  Who knows these answers and who is right?  It can be very confusing especially when someone else is telling you what to do and you come to find that what they said was only right for them...but they don't have ADHD.  For me many times....in order to comply with what other people want....I simply have to find my own answers and do what I know will work for me despite what any one else tells me differently.  Ultimately....it is what other people want from me even if how I get there is different than them.  Part of having ADHD means that other people are not always going to agree with how I get there but......they never seem to disagree with the results itself if it is what they want in the first place.  At times...this can feel like you cannot win but I also realize...this is just part of having ADHD and I have to accept that too.

    So for me.....These Four Agreements makes it simple and easy.  It has served to improve my abilities in dealing with my ADHD tremendously and for that reason I wanted to introduce it to anyone else who might find it useful to them as well.  It's not a lot to remember, it's not complicated and it serves me on a daily basis to try and follow them as best I can.  Doing your best is actually the fourth agreement itself.  I thought for anyone who is looking for something easy to remember and a simple guide to follow....it is definitely a good place to start.  If you are interested...the book is available just about any place that sells books either online or in most book stores: 

    "The Four Agreements", written by Don Miguel Ruiz .

    "Nobody abuses us more than we abuse ourselves Don Miguel Ruiz

    “You need a very strong will in order to adopt the Four Agreements—but if you
    can begin to live your life with these agreements, the transformation in your life
    will be amazing. You will see the drama of hell disappear right before your very
    eyes. Instead of living in a dream of hell, you will be creating a new dream—your
    personal dream of heaven.

    “The First Agreement: Be Impeccable with Your Word
    The Second Agreement: Don’t Take Anything Personally
    The Third Agreement: Don’t Make Assumptions
    The Fourth Agreement: Always Do Your Best”


    1ST AGREEMENT: BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD
    “The first agreement is the most important one and also the most difficult one to honor. It is so
    important that with just this first agreement you will be able to transcend to the level of existence I call heaven on earth. The first agreement is to be impeccable with your word It sounds very simple, but it is very, very powerful.”
    Impeccability means ‘without sin.’Impeccablecomes from the Latin pecatus which means ‘sin.’’ Religions talk about sin and sinners, but let’sunderstand what it really means to sin. A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself.Everything you feel or believe or say that goes against yourself is a sin. You go against yourself when you judge or blame yourself for anything. Being without sin is exactly the opposite. Being impeccable is not going against yourself. When you are impeccable, you take responsibility for your actions, but you do not judge or blame yourself.”

    2ND AGREEMENT: DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
    “Whatever happens around you, don’t take it personally... if I see you on the street and say,‘Hey, you are so stupid,’ without knowing you, it’s not about you; it’s about me. If you take it personally, then perhaps you believe you are stupid. Maybe you think to yourself, ‘How does he know? Is he clairvoyant, or can everybody see how stupid I am? ’”This is another theme that all the great teachers come back to again and again and again (and
    again :). “When you make it a strong habit not to take anything personally, you avoid many upsets in your life. Your anger, jealousy, and envy will disappear, and even your sadness will simply disappear if you don’t take
    things personally.”

    3RD AGREEMENT: DON’T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
    “We have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth. We could swear they are real. We make assumptions about what others are doing or thinking—we take it personally—then we blame them and react by sending emotional poison with our word. That is why when we make assumptions, we’re asking for problems. We make an assumption, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing. The way to keep yourself from making assumptions is to ask questions.  Make sure the communication is clear. If you don’t understand, ask.  Have the courage to ask questions until you are as clear as you can be.”

    4TH AGREEMENT: ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST
    “There is just one more agreement, but it’s the one that allows the other three to become deeply ingrained habits. The fourth agreement is about the action of the first three: Always do your best.”
    “Under any circumstance, always do your best, no more and no less. But keep in mind that your best is never going to be the same from one moment to the next. Everything is alive and changing all the time, so your best will sometimes be high quality, and other times it will not be as good.”

    Doing your best, you will always live your life intensely. You will be productive and will good to yourself because you are giving to yourself , to your family, to your community and to everything.  But it is the action that will make you feel intensely happy.  When you always do your best you always take action.

     

    For me....the last line (highlighted) has been the key for me either being a happy person or feeling hopeless.  Out of the 4 agreements...it's the only one that I can honestly say I am living and full filling most of the time and without question for myself.....it has made a significant difference in helping me manage and improve having ADHD. 

    I hope someone else will benefit from this if you care to try as it has been my salvation in life to this point.  I'm still working on the other three as they appear to be much more difficult (especially number one) yet...applying number four...it is getting easier all the time:)

     

    J

  • by: jade21 - 2 months 1 week ago

    I feel I'm frankly at the point where I am ready to file for divorce.  I feel like I've lost myself.  I think I've felt like that our whole relationship.  I am sick of feeling like I am his mother.  I am sick of my needs always coming last.  I am sick of feeling so alone.  I am sick of feeling unsupported and taken advantage of.  Most of all, I am sick of being lied to.  My husband has a porn addiction.  He is always on the brink of addiction with alcohol or anything else that will "numb the pain."  He hadn't been watching porn (at least to my knowledge) for a four months.  He started watching porn again and I found it on his phone.  He admitted to it and said it was a one time mistake.  I found crap on his ipod a week ago.  He tried gaslighting me and saying it was from before.  I told him I know it is not from before, because I have checked his ipod periodically.  He continued to lie even when confronted.  He continued to say I was crazy.  He then finally came clean.  I told him I am done with his lies.  I told him if he watches porn and isn't forthcoming enough to tell me about it, I'm going to the divorce attorney.  What do I find yet again on his phone.  He was home one day this week and nothing was done.  I knew that's what he was doing.  I'm tired of this cycle.  He says he's not going to confront any emotions or feelings, because that's what led to his depression.  How the hell can anything be accomplished if you ignore everything?  If you ignore your spouses emotional needs?  He is in serious denial.  I have never wanted a divorce.  I have stood by his side through so much.  Yet, where is his compassion?  Where is his motivation to be a good husband and father.  He says he tries.  Yes he does try, but it always comes back to his constant lies.  How can I ever trust someone who continues to lie and be dishonest.  And someone who has no empathy or compassion for what I go through?  His behavior is unacceptable.  I'm scare to leave my husband, but I am scare to stay.  I don't want to start over at this point in my life.  However, I don't feel I am really living either.  Thanks for letting me vent : )

  • by: fujibug - 2 months 2 weeks ago

    I'm new here, so bear with me. I've been in a relationship with my ADHD bf for 11 years. We've had a lot of the common ADHD issues, like communication problems, forgetfulness, failure to follow through etc. But I think the one issue that has been the hardest for me to deal with is lying. I guess I can't really be sure when the lying began, but it started causing problems while we were in college. He would lie about things that I'm guessing a lot of guys lie to their girlfriends about, like drinking too much or hanging out with *certain* people, that I would disapprove of.

    But when it continued after college was over and we were living together I got worried. One thing that we really clashed with after college was his interest in joining the military. I am fervently opposed to the military (please don't judge, just my personal opinion) but that's not the only thing that came to my mind when I told him I didn't want him to join. All that time away, and the possibility of him being killed, among other things just made it impossible for me to accept. I told him that I would not go along with that decision and if he wanted to join that we would have to separate. After a lot of discussion he agreed that he would not sign up. About two months later I had the urge to look at his emails, so I did. And what I saw was that the entire time he was continuing to communicate with a recruiter and planning to send some paperwork over to start the process of signing up. I couldn't believe it. I thought how did he think that eventually I wouldn't find out? And if he wanted to join that bad, why didn't he just break up with me since I told him that's what he would have to do? When I confronted him about it, he ended up telling the recruiter he was no longer interested. To be completely honest, I think that maybe the ADHD created some fantasy in his head of how joining the military would fix his life when it definitely wouldn't. Now, years later, he thanks me for talking him out of it. But that huge lie put a scar on our relationship.

    Moving on, we moved out of our home state together and now we don't really have anyone else around besides the two of us, so we spend a lot of time together. It's been good, I think. I would have thought that we would fight and argue a lot more, being down each other's throats all the time, but we actually get along pretty great. But the ADHD has caused some problems for him with his new job. His boss quickly picked up on the fact that he has a hard time focusing, remembering things, and making good decisions. He actually almost got fired several times over bad decisions he has made and at this point he is on his final warning. It's sad because he actually tries really hard and is so friendly to everyone at work, it's just that he struggles with the ADHD. Anyway, his boss is kind of a bully and she also kind of comes on to the men at the company a lot (she's kind of a slut). So I don't  really think much of her and he knows it. At the company Christmas party, she got drunk and made a fool of herself. Well, after that he told me that he wouldn't go to any more company parties because of all the drinking and the fact that a lot of the employees are kind of mean to him.

    But he was just invited to a 4th of July party today and he said he wanted to go to "improve his reputation" and that the party was going to be mostly playing sports and activities. I asked him if families were invited and he said he wasn't sure. Well, an email popped up on his phone and I read it. It was a reply from another worker about how they need someone to bring the jello shots. So I looked at the past emails in that conversation, and the invitation from his boss to the party was in there and it said that the party was going to be at HER house and that it was going to be mostly drinking and watching the fireworks. Oh and that all families are invited. So I asked him why did he lie to me about it? His response- "I thought it would be awkward if you went since you don't like my boss." So that means lie to me about it? He apologized, but I'm still angry because over the years he has lied about SO MANY things. 

    He has lied about stupid ridiculous things like what he ate that day, or where he left his house keys. Things that I'm like, WHAT DO YOU GAIN FROM LYING ABOUT THAT? And he doesn't even know. He has lied so much that I can't even begin to remember most of them. I'm at a loss.
     

    The other issue that he has struggled with that I am really worried about is unsafe driving. He has a really hard time focusing on what he is doing when he is driving. Even when there is no music, no distractions, he just can't focus. Last year, he bought an $8000 truck when his budget was $4000. I supported him because it was a really nice truck. But within six months, he totaled it. He pulled out in front of someone and got t-boned. He had just spent $1200 on it a week before getting the engine fixed and new tires. And because of that, we decided to fix it. We got a guy to do it for $5000. (I know how absurd that is.) And after that I had a serious talk with him about his driving. I made him feel really bad about the fact that he spent the same amount of money fixing it as he had paid for it and it was double his original budget. He promised to be more careful. 

    Well, another six months go by, and he made another bad decision and both sides of the trucks body now need about $1000 worth of repairs. To make things worse, a few weeks after this happened, we were in a parking garage pulling out of a parking space, and he would've hit a pole in the garage if I hadn't screamed. I don't know what to do.

    SO HERE ARE MY QUESTIONS:

    1. HAS ANYONE BEEN EVEN SLIGHTLY SUCCESSFUL IN DEALING WITH UNSAFE DRIVING DUE TO ADHD? IF SO, HOW?

    2. DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR HOW TO DEAL WITH THE LYING?

    THANK YOU FOR ANY SUGGESTIONS :) And thank you for reading my super long story.

  • by: panda123 - 2 months 2 weeks ago

    Here is an article from Additude magazine about coping techniques for wives with husbands that have ADHD.  http://www.additudemag.com/adhd-web/article/658.html. I hope the link works.  I follow their page on facebook and get really good articles for adults and kids. This article is pretty good except I'm not crazy about the first scenario-taking out the trash and the husband gets distracted and doesn't do it.  They go on to say wives feel it's just easier to do those things themselves then to keep reminding etc.  Which is true for me.  They recommend saying things like "I really appreciate that you took out the trash".  This is just me and I know I have my own issues, but I don't like this.  I never get a thank you for doing any of the 1,000's of things I do everyday.  I also try to teach my kids that some things you just have to do.  And I praise them for a job well done but I don't thank them for doing something they should be doing.  When I lived on my own, no one was there to thank me for doing the dishes or keeping the apartment clean.  I did it for the internal satisfaction of having a clean living space.  I went off an a little tangent.  Sorry.  The rest of the article is pretty good, except in my case, if I "checked in" with my husband during tasks he would not appreciate the help, he would yell at me. That's the issue, his anger. I like at the end when the wife says she has learned to just go places in separate cars since he is always running late.  She feels better knowing that she won't be late. 

  • by: c ur self - 2 months 2 weeks ago

    What are the options for children and adults when they come to the realization that their day to day lives are being lived in a irresponsible manner?

    1) Continue to ignore it. (This is as for as it gets for most who have no mirror i.e. (parent, spouse, teacher's, friends).

    2) Blame and denial...(do all they can to turn it around and blame someone, make someone else responsible for their actions. This is the common results for those who do have mirrors, it gives them the illusion they need to be able to continue in this lifestyle with no convictions to change it, it allows them to feel good about themselves.

    3) Recognize it, learn from it, accept it as theirs alone, work toward correcting it. (This is the painful process that allows growth and makes this person someone others can enjoy being around)

    C
     

  • by: jennalemone - 2 months 2 weeks ago

    Selective Sound Sensitivity Syndrome.

    Wifeafraid, I am so sorry you are going through all these things you listed on your first post. I am starting a new thread after realizing these comments would have hijacked your thread in a different direction.  I hope you find a road to wellness soon and that you doctor is a good one that can help sort things out that is going on with you.  

    I just have one comment that I can speak of that may help a few people here...  Those of us who are, by nature,...easily irrtatated.  There is a things called MISOPHONIA.  I have had this since I was a pre-teen but the idea that it is a syndome of so many people in the world has just come to light in the past 5 years.  It is defined as "hatred of repeating sound".  Like when someone is smacking loudly, cracking gum and you are stuck with them in a small room, pencil tapping, clocks loudly ticking....many more but you get the drift.  People have this in all sorts of levels.  I have it, Kelly Rippa has it.  I can live with it because I have the freedom most often to remove myself from the situation.  But it IS literally a HATRED of sound.  Odd isn't it?  At least you can Google this word now and know that about 15% of the population in the world has it to some degrees.  I have a friend who cannot bear to be around someone who has anything wood in their mouth.  toothpick, popccicle stick.  

  • by: wifeafraid - 2 months 2 weeks ago

    Hi everyone,

    I am a 28yo woman and finally have comes to terms I may have ADHD. But I am so afraid of going to the doctor for fear I will be called an idiot like I have been called my entire life.

    My husband made an appointment for me this week knowing I wanted one but was afraid to. I'm hoping if I blurt of everything here first that perhaps someone living this way can tell me if I am just crazy, or realistically may have this condition. I guess so I can calm down a bit for the appointment if that makes any sense at all? lol

    For the last few months my husband and I have been writing down (well, when I see the paper and remember to) my 'quirks' so that when I see the doctor I wont get flustered and forget it all like normal!

    Here we go..

    - I am always off 'in space'. I cant stop myself from getting distracted and thinking a million thoughts when I am meant to be doing something. I daydream in so much detail its like I could write a book!  Not good socially or at school/work...

    - I lose focus and train of thought. More then feeling distracted. I will be at a funeral and cant stop looking around and feeling restless and bored. I feel so ashamed admitting this I'm so sorry!!

    - I have zero friends. Literally zero. I am the kind of person who loves people, I am super chatty and I want to be everyone's friend but I cant stop spitting out sentences that make no sense or say things without thinking or drifting off 'into space' in the middle of a conversation. I mix words up constantly or get ever personal without thinking first. It makes me look rude and I swear I don't mean it!! It just happens. I hate myself for doing it. But I don't know how to stop. I was told all the way growing up I was rude, that I would make faces/too facially expressive (no idea I was going it) that I would exaggerate as a child/teen something terrible. I wouldn't mean to, it would just..happen and I would then be too afraid to correct it. Then I was called a liar. Argh.. I don't get along with women, actually its the other way around. I get along great with men, but I don't understand most women and feel entirely different from them. I have a huge inability to tolerate gossip and bull*. It drives me completely crazy and I cannot live with anyone in my life like that. I need simplicity and order from people I need to know where I stand 100% of the time. I cannot stand not knowing things. I feel almost paranoid about it.

    -I cannot stand to be touched. This greatly effects my marriage. I wasn't like this in the beginning, at all. Polar opposite!

    -I forget SO much. I lose my coffee 500 times a day around the house. I will have a drink in front of me and forget its there and go and make another one. I forget appointments. I'm always late. I (im so ashamed) forgot my grandmother was having a get together for my daughters birthday and didn't show up. I swear it wasn't until the next week but I was wrong apparently. She wouldn't talk to me for a month no matter how much I pleaded and apologized! I feel so stupid and hate myself over that. How could I forget THAT??

    -I struggled all through school and dropped out. I am actually not unintelligent, I am advanced in some areas but because I couldn't concentrate on the reading or the teacher talking I couldn't do the work and I NEVER did the homework because I couldn't remember anything from class. I failed everything except cookery classes and literature but that was because I was an advanced student and the teacher allowed me to read more complex books and allowed me to creatively work. I AM a terrible speller though. I have to proof read even simple SMS because I tend to type so fast I misspell everything or type the word twice or I just don't make sense. I was placed in an 'alternate pathways' class because they predicted I would drop out. The class was for those with dyslexia etc.

    - Time flies for me, I swear I will just look at something for 2 minutes and next thing its been an hour. Or two. My husband hates taking me shopping for this reason. I go in for one thing and im our 45 minutes later with a trolley load of things we didn't need.

    -I get really easily irritated. Over anything really. I cant stand 'noises' like tapping, weird noises, house noises or crowds or the ticking of watches...I HATE analog clocks!!! I want to smash them lol I get so angry and irritated over the stupidest things looking back. I am so contradictory. I hate people not talking I hate movies because I get bored and restless and then have to talk or leave. I hate it when people talk too long or when I want to say something I hate phone calls. I feel awful again. I hate it when someone in the family calls to say hello and I have nothing to say and they have nothing to say so they start talking about 'whatever' and I want to hang up on them. I hate SMELLS. Banana is my worst enemy. I gag and have to leave or I WILL throw up. Had with banana loving kids. I leave the room so they can eat them :) I hate clutter. I hate anything disorganized. I get antsy. I am very sensitive to heat and cold!! I get extremely itchy when I'm feeling irritated or stressed out. I am very sensitive to light, it dazes me. I don't know, just SO much irritates me. Too much to list.

    -I am quick to anger. I get irritated and then I start snapping. Not at strangers, at loved ones and this makes me feel ill. I snap and fight and pick. Without thinking, its instantaneous and causes so much pain in my marriage ad with my parents.

    - I always have rapid thoughts ir music on repeat in my head. I don't know how to 'not' think.

    - I have massive issues with insomnia. I had testing done and nothing is technically wrong other then over thinking. I was given a cd of calming music I threw out because I couldnt stand it after a minute. I sleep with the washing machine on at night so its white noise and eventually drowns out my thoughts so I can sleep.

    - I'm always tired because of the above.

    - I live my life always looking ahead and trying to predict things.

    - I suffer from anxiety and bouts of depression. I get chronically anxious anytime I am exposed to anything stressful. An exam or work. I cannot work because of the anxiety. When it gets too much I faint from anxiety attacks.

    - I have dermatillomania which makes like difficult and hard to face in public but I have improved some what with therapy. Make up is my life saver. I pick when I become overwhelmed. Disastrous.

    - I suffer headaches and migraines

    -I feel edgy all day long

    -I fidget all day long

    - I am either over active, go go go or I am a sloth and struggle to do anything at all then have to suddenly rush and then get anxiety attacks.

    - I hate driving because I lose focus easily and scare myself. I can drive somewhere and no know how I got there. I have kids so I refuse to drive out of town and my husband does 90%. I get too anxious. Especially city, the thought makes me anxious. I hate crowds and I get confused with all the cars and fearful I'll make a costly mistake or will miss something.

    - I get obsessive when I get excited about things. I get an idea and I get fixated and spend hours and hours a day researching it or doing it. But the second it gets hard or I get bored I give up. Its not because I don't want to, its because I just cant manage it anymore. I feel so stupid when this happens.

    - I cannot complete anything. I have started many courses to better myself, my confidence and employment prospects and really give my 100% when I start. I daydream and obsess over what I can achieve but then again, I cannot focus and concentrate I don't take the information in and I leave half way because I'm failing. The same applies to business ventures I start, I have the best of intentions when I stat and all I want is to help my family but I ruin us with my bad financial commitments to start and stop these things!! I am talking $20,000+ now. Its so frustrating because I know I'm capable!!!! I KNOW I could do it if I could just 'get it'. Its hard to explain. Hopefully you know what I mean.

    - I LOVE organization and dream of the perfect home but I am so messy!! I just cant keep anything in order myself no matter how many times I start.

    -I am a chronic list maker. I have lists for everything and re do them constantly when they get cluttered with crosses and more items.

    - I am extremely emotional. I do take things to heart. I think a lot of it is from loneliness and feeling so stupid and incapable to do anything at all.

    Obviously I expanded on my list and wrote explanations to hopefully make sense of what I am feeling and experiencing but these are things I have had my entire life.

    The problem is I was diagnosed at 16 with anxiety and depression after I overdosed on painkillers. I was a trauma victim so all the help I received has been targeted towards recovering from that and onwards. I am afraid the doctor will not acknowledge my past and a teen and a child because of this and also because I was adopted. When my parents did reach out for help for me as a child the doctors always said it was just effects of adoption and was seeking attention, but I have never had an issue with my adoption!!! I am afraid I will be simply called an over reactor and an idiot.

    But I cant live like this any longer. I feel like I an slowly suffocating and wasting away in life. I am tired of being useless and I am tired of being lonely. Nothing I do seems to help.

    I want to be a great mother and wife but I fail abysmally.

    I have been diagnosed in the past as having GAD, social anxiety, depression, mood disorders, multiple personality disorders and bipolar. I do not believe I have bipolar or multiple personality disorder for one minute though and refused to see that doctor again. I don't feel like my personality changes. I don't know how to be content though, normal people mystify me.  Its so frustrating to try and explain lol

    I am so sorry this is no long and probably doesn't make much sense. But I just wanted to hear from those with ADHD if this sounds like you or if I will more likely be diagnosed as bipolar or something else altogether. I am so scared of what will happen but I know I need help. I'm not functioning anymore and my poor children are paying the price. I want to be the mother they deserve.

     

  • by: Frustrated Non-ADHD - 2 months 2 weeks ago
    Why is it OK for people with ADHD to procrastinate and get distracted the way they do? Why tolerate it? Why stay married to someone who obviously doesn't care enough to change? People without ADHD need to stop tolerating this type of behavior. It is not OK and it is not fair. NON-ADHD people need to take a stand. I believe it is a made up disorder for people who are simply lazy. I don't think it's right that society has come up with an excuse for these people when the rest of us have to suffer. They need to learn to be responsible and society needs to stop enabling them.

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