It’s the catch-22 of ADHD-impacted relationships (and many non-ADHD marriages, as well!) For many couples impacted by ADHD, distraction, disengagement and retreat from conflict leave non-ADHD partners feeling ‘stranded’ and lonely. Their natural response is to pursue their partner for attention…and disaster results. What do you do?
Hello to all of my blog readers! I want to let you know that I will be taking a medical leave starting about June 18, lasting possibly into August. The website will be up and running, and Nancie Kohlenberger, the co-author of The Couple's Guide to Thriving with ADHD and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, will be posting here and keeping an eye on the forum conversations. So things at adhdmarriage.com will go on pretty much the same except you might notice my silence. Please welcome Nancie if you come across her - I hope she will continue to be a presence on the site long after my return! And make sure to pick her brain - she's not only an expert in ADHD and relationships, but she is also a woman with ADHD, married to a man with ADHD, so she has much to offer with her perspective.
You suspect your partner might have ADHD but are unsure how to bring up the topic. What do you do?
ADHD in adults can be a sensitive topic. Some feel that ADHD "is not real" or "just for kids" while others, sensitized after years of comments that they should 'just try harder' might take the suggestion that they might have ADHD as a direct criticism. And some adults embroiled in the struggles of 'the ADHD Effect' might worry that considering the possibility that they might have ADHD would be tantamount to admitting they are to blame for your marital struggles.