ADD and Memory
Posted April 8th, 2008 by MelissaOrlov
One of our readers commented on his experiences with vastly improving memory since his diagnosis of ADD, so I went to Dr. Hallowell to ask him – does ADD affect memory? His response was typical Hallowell in the very best sense:
“My years of experience have taught me that ADD affects memory in a major way. This is the analogy I use. Think of your memory bank as a block of wood. Think of a piece of information or data or an image as the nail. Attention is what hammers the nail into the wood. This is what we mean by studying. So, if attention is variable, many nails will not get hammered in.”
The original message from our reader shows from his own personal experience why improved memory from his ADD treatment is so important in his own relationships:
“… it's blazingly obvious in my own life (that memory and ADD are linked). I was diagnosed with ADHD about 18 months ago (I'm currently 38), and started on meds. When I look back over my life, it's like an enormous fogbank with occasional flashes of color...up until about 18 months ago. I can actually remember stuff that has happened since then. I can correlate multiple experiences and identify resulting consequences (and let me tell you, this has led to enormous revelations, both about myself and about my relationships). I can have a conversation about something that's happened in the past year and a half and not sound like a blithering idiot. In short: medication for ADHD has been a huge boost in my ability to remember things. It's vaguely possible that this is all attributable to some other thing, cause unknown, but Occam's Razor would place a thumb squarely on the ADHD.”
So, next time you are trying to think of reasons why it might make sense to get treatment for your ADD, think of Dr. Hallowell’s nail and hammer analogy, as well as how nice it would be to be able to “correlate multiple experiences and identify resulting consequences”!
Technorati Tags:
Poor Memory & Marital Problems
My husband has ADD, diagnosed since childhood, and we have been married almost 7 years. I am perpetually frustrated with his memory and am trying to understand if and how and to what extent ADD effects memory. I am at such a loss for words when it comes to explaining the problems we have with his memory that all I can do is provide some examples. We have been living with my parents for almost 2 years now. We both were working, but 6 months after the birth of our first child we decided it was best to quit our jobs, sell our home and accept my father's invitation to live with him until my husband found a new job. We did this so that I could be a stay-at-home mom. When we conceived, we were able to afford me staying home. Half way through the pregnancy, our financial situation changed such that we had to file for a bankruptcy. I continued working and we had found good daycare. I was never happy with the role of a working mother and when our daycare gave us notice, we were unable to find a comparable replacement. I remember having several heart-to-heart conversations with my husband before, during and after the pregnancy sharing with him my dream of being a stay-at-home mom. When we discussed selling our home and moving in with my parents, I remember explicitly sharing with him that I wanted to be a stay-at-home mom for however long, possibly until our kids entered high school, provided our finances could support that plan. I shared that I may return to work at some point sooner if our finances deemed it necessary and/or if I found I needed an outlet of my own. He was supportive of that not once expressing any concerns or disagreement with the idea. After we placed our home up for sale, there were days when I felt discouraged and he would remind me that we were doing this so that I could be a stay-at-home mom and how much better this would be for our children and that we were selling our house at the right time, etc. About one year after our move to my father's, my husband shared with me that he expected me to return to work full-time when our firstborn enters 1st grade. When I brought up our past discussions, he told me that he would not have agreed to this move if he knew I had not been planning to return to work. I am flabbergastedly so confused as to how this miscommunication occurred. I have self-examined myself to exhaustion and replayed conversations over and over in my head and I know with all my heart I was very clear about what I envisioned and when I would return to work.
A more recent example, I have been looking for a rental home for us to move into for about 5 weeks now. I have expended a great deal of energy into this task researching movers, realtors, property management firms and exhausting online and paper resources. My husband and I had a conversation and several that once we knew his contract position would be renewed for another year that we would begin looking for a home to rent. (We have been saving money ever since he found a job - which took him 8 months). We learned earlier than expected that his contract was being renewed. I asked him, "Since we know prematurely that your job is being renewed, should we start looking for a house now or should we wait until the actual renewal date of your contract passes?" He replied with "No, we can move tomorrow if we wanted to. Go ahead and start looking." This past weekend as I was sharing with my husband my frustration with an agent regarding a particular property I was following up on, he said in passing, "I thought we were waiting until I had a permanent job before we looked for a rental home." Imagine my bewilderment!
Please tell me, is it normal for people with ADD to forget things like this? Can their memories be distorted or mixed with intentions of saying/doing things that in reality never occurred? Is there a memory disorder that can occur comorbidly with ADD that would explain things like this? I am so exasperated and concerned at the same time. My husband has shared with me the other night that he is also alarmed by his lack of memory - he feels it is getting worse especially so over these passed 2-3 months. He has been medicated his entire life and in his adult years has found great success with Concerta and methylphenidate. He doesn't take them together. Which pill he takes is determined by what his immediate needs are or based on the type of situation he is preparing for. If he needs a fast-acting boost that won't keep him up at night (if he forgot to take his concerta in the morning) then he'll take the methylphenidate. Otherwise, I believe the Concerta is his primary medication. Anyhow, any insight would be greatly appreciated.
A-HA!
I can relate to the 'suddenly thinking that my memory is so much clearer' thought...
I believe that -- from my own experience and speaking only for myself -- that the being able to 'put a label' on what the hell was 'wrong' with me made things so much easier for me, and therefore time / attention span / worry about that 'wrong' thing with me really wasn't anything wrong, and so my time could now be spent on working on this new 'answer' to what's going on in my head, and how to now work with this. I remember just feeling like I finally had the answer.....
I discovered my own ADD at age 37, a weasely shrink hit on the right chord with me when he introduced me to the term 'ADD', and gave me a run-down of a list of symptoms and issues. I think it was from dr hallowell's Driven to Distraction book, and I remember reading it (one of about 5 books I can recall I've ever read in my life). I didn't stay with that shrink for too long, but it did help me realize that I wasn't a complete idiot or failure, and I now DID have something to work with.
It took another year or more, and plenty of other poking around, to deal with getting a good medical crutch for my ADD; and at first I thought it was about finding the right pill, but in time I learned that it's NOT ABOUT A PILL, but there's a lot of mis-information and heavy-duty moral consternation if we don't fit the mold of the teachers and the other kids around us who are smart AND have good grades, too... I was just smart, but never really wonderfully successful at applying it all...
But back to the 'memory'... I wasn't overloaded with the 'what's wrong' thoughts any more, and suddenly I was absorbing stuff and I felt SO SMART and my memory was so great. I always have had a knack for memory tricks, and pnemonic (sp?) devices and memory tricks... and numbers and data come easily to me, trivia, too... but not the 'regular' stuff they tried to instill in me, such as 'classroom' material.
But here I am, a dozen years later now, and I still am learning, more and more each day. Good thing I have a pretty good memory.
I always thought I was stupid
I always thought I was the dumb one in a brilliant family. Overwelled and inadequete is how I always felt. Most of the time I feel like Im fumbling in the dark. Year later I have a family, and my 7 yr old son is just like me. We are told by teachers, our family doctor and the school psycologist that our son has adhd. It was like a brilliant light shining down on me. When we took him to the doctor, they have a checklist for adhd, and guess what, most of the symptoms apply to me. It was a relief to put a name to how I feel. That was 5 years ago. I have funtioned ok for 35 years, but my symptoms seems to be getting worse 6 months ago, I cant even concentrate on cooking dinner. Is it possible for my add to get worse as I get older?( Im not on meds)
the key word her IMHO is
the key word her IMHO is meds. Why not try them? You might find they will help you tremendously in your life. Experts say it should be diagnosis, treatment with meds, then cognitive behavioral therapy. Find a good diagnostician who knows medications. On any med you try, start slow and titrate up until you see it is the right med for you. It is trial and error for a while, but if you hang in ther, all will be so much clearer.
symptoms getting worse
Your symptoms might be getting worse if you are in a particularly busy or stressful period of your life. Both of these things seem to contribute to increasing symptoms.
Melissa Orlov
symptoms
Melissa,
My symptoms seemed to have gotten worse since I became aware of them. Stress in my life is extremely high with two 17 year olds who are probably ADD and are not exactly going forward in the desired manner. Therapy hasn't hasn't helped much for the kids and I keep at therapy with my therapist but there seems to be a block between her advice and my being able to carry it out. I never was consistent with discipline because I saw that my kids knew what they did was wrong and I forgave them so I didn't hold to punishment I can't get past that they "get it" and will learn. Then it goes right back to stressing me out because they can get what they want from me. It's obviously cyclical but I feel that things are worse since I fold out what my problem is(about 8 months ago). I am on meds-slowly increasing. My Dr. will only increase 5mg/ month. Currently I am at 20mg adderal. This has been torture and too long for progress. Husband is pretty good but does nit like the difficultness of the children. Any thoughts?
symptoms
My first thought is that I might look into getting a second opinion from a second doctor - not about your diagnosis, but about how the meds are being doled out. Finding the right ADD med is often an exercise in experimentation - if one med doesn't seem to be working increasing the dose is one approach, but so is trying different medications. In addition, there is a tone of anxiousness in your note. Perhaps you can talk with this doctor (or another) about whether anxiety or depression are augmenting your problems?
A second thought - it seems as if you are taking too much of the responsibility of the 17 year olds' behavior on yourself. Having teens is stressful for many, many people (not just those with ADD) and one good way to deal with it is to not only try to help them, but also to get the support of your spouse, of friends in similar situations, and sometimes of doctors (you don't mention if the kids have been diagnosed, or what their issues are, but a diagnosis can be very helpful, particularly before the transition to college...)
Finally, it's probably not that your symptoms have gotten worse since your diagnosis, but rather that you are more aware of them (or that your expectations for quick changes have been raised, and you are more frustrated than before). If you are having trouble following through on the plans that you and your therapist are creating, it may be that you aren't getting enough relief from your treatment plan and need to add or try other things (aerobic exercise, by the way, really helps with focus as well as with alleviating depression and anxiety. Consider fast walking, or working out 4-5 times a week).
If you would like to share some of the "difficulties of the children" with us, perhaps we can provide some ideas on that front.
Melissa Orlov
My memory...
has stunk all my life. I have a hard time remembering anyone's names (even people I KNOW!) or recalling vocabulary while in a conversation or giving a speech, events that I was supposed to attend, etc. I'm not currently taking any medication, but it's beginning to sound like I might need to check that out. I've not been able to afford treatment, so I haven't really pursued it, but now I think I really need to do something.
I was hoping that by reading a few of Hallowell's books I would come across some alternative treatments to medication. I understand there is a holistic approach to the idea, but I'm not sure I will get the holistic treatment I am seeking here... just medicated and sent on my merry way. So anyhow... I've begun my search (once again)... hopefully I can actually finish it this time.
Maybe I'll try the fish oil pills, and multivitamins and try to get some exercise in a timely manner... and figure out how to be "Well-enough" organized to get through life. Anyone know how I can explain all this to my wife without it sounding like an excuse? She also says she has heard me say all this before (funny, I can't remember telling her that).
Ach! Sorry... bad commenting on my part... exactly where will I go to find the answers to all these questions I'm asking!?! Hehe... oh well.
I applaud you, the husband,
I applaud you, the husband, for researching and learning more about ADD. In the past couple of years, I've come to realize that both my husband and I have ADD (our three kids probably are affected as well). I've done tons of research on the topic, take medication, am seeing a counselor, etc. My husband of nearly 18 years on the other hand wants to behave as if no problems/issues exist in our relationship/marriage/parenting, etc., is unwilling to discuss the issue, etc. Right now I am reading two books that you and your wife may find helpful - Honey, Are You Listening by Dr. Rick Fowler and You, Your Relationship, And Your ADD (a workbook by Michael Bell). Both are written by men with ADD - I find their viewpoint fascinating and am able to understand my husband more. Fowler's book inserts comments from his wife throughout, discussing how his condition/actions have affected her.
A woman posted under another topic area about how she and her husband handle his condition (daily exercise, downtimes, set communication times, etc.) . Wish I could direct you to her post, but I've forgotten exactly where it is.
Open, honest communication about your condition, struggles, feelings, etc. with your wife is very important. Somehow in my 18 years of marriage I let myself become voiceless and powerless (and therefore depressed/anxious) to a certain degree. With counselling that is beginning to change, and I honestly feel better and more hopeful than I have in years.
Take care. You are taking important steps for yourself and your relationship.
We've read Honey, Are You
We've read Honey, Are You Listening (but to be honest I've forgotten everything it said, maybe I need to reread it)... I got it for her and I think she read it before we even got married. I wanted to make sure she knew what she was getting into before she was stuck with me. But, I've not really been seeking any continued treatment until now...
I've just been getting to a point were enough is enough, and it would be nice to feel normal for once (whatever normal would be).
Why Meds?
No one on this site will tell you you have to get meds to work to treat your ADD, but Dr. Hallowell will tell you that you might want to try them. His reasoning is that meds help over 70% of those who try them, without significant side effect. And, he would posit, there are significant side effects to not treating ADD - such as relationship problems, school issues (for kids), low self esteem, etc. The good thing about these meds is you can try them, and if you don't like them they go out of your system quickly and that's that. It's really a "no lose" kind of thing.
The non-medicinal approaches are growing (including things like CogMed for memory issues) and shouldn't be ignored, but it doesn't have to be an either/or situation. You do need some discipline to keep up the non-medicinal approaches, and you'll know yourself well enough to know if you can do it (diet, exercise, meditation, behavior modification, educaiton, are all parts of the non-medicinal side). For a bit more info on different types of non-medicinal treatments, go to what the Hallowell Center offers at this link.
And, know thta if you decide to try meds, you'll want to experiment (with your doctor's help) to find the one that fits you best. Finally, meds DON'T work alone. You still have to also do the behavior modification, etc. The meds just make sticking with it easier. I use my daughter's experience to illustrate why. Once she started taking meds (and found the right one, which took a while) she was able to focus for the first time in her life. But because she hadn't ever focused before, she had never learned how to organize herself. So she spent a good deal of time learning how to study, how to keep notes about her assignments, how to turn them in on time, etc. These are skills most of her classmates had already started on, and she needed to catch up. You'll need to catch up, too, but there is no embarassment in that. THink of it as "training" - the same type of training that you would need to do if you were to start a new sport and really take it seriously.
Your best treatment will be the one that lets you be you (in your best self) and helps you get rid of the stuff that's getting in your way.
Melissa Orlov
meds
I too had to try different meds before i found the right one. I was in my fifties when I began taking them. Five and something years later I'm beginning my "training" now on how to organize. That's a big one for me but now that i can focus more on me and not too much on others , I'm seeing things more clearly. Rereading Crazy , Busy again has helped me understand what's really important and what isn't in my workplace.