Recent Comments

  • by: JJamieson - 1 hour 17 min ago
    The stereotypes are already out there.  I'd like to shoot the person who coined "Attention Deficit".....what the F*&K! In part that's why I came here listen, learn and to better understand what is and what isn't ADHD for myself.  What I initially found was nothing I already didn't know which were the same stereotypical ideas that I hear all the time.  But after reading the post from spouses of ADHD partners long enough I do see the patters emerging even though they are very...
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?

  • by: c ur self - 2 hours 19 min ago
    So, it's safe to say overcome evil with good isn't your favorite quote? Sorry I upset you dvance you sound like a responsible hard working wife and parent. I just wonder if you read this post you've written here to your H, would he feel bad about his lack of support and sharing in the responsibilities of your home and family with you...I sure hope things get better and y'all can find the happiness and unity you deserve...Life is way too short!
    >>> on Forum topic - Stepping outside the box to get a view through someone else's eyes

  • by: c ur self - 2 hours 58 min ago
    That wasn't the enemy, that was you :) I Know...How well I Know...:) I most definitely have expectations.  Expectations that I will do better tomorrow than I did today. Now that's the good kind...more of us should have them that apply to us :)  I have a few: 1) I expect myself to not to be troubled in my spirit when my wife doesn't comply with my expectations for our marriage:)...2) I expect myself to be wise enough to not respond to dead end comments...3) I expect myself to be at peace in my spirit...
    >>> on Forum topic - "Looking angry vs Being angry"

  • by: dvance - 3 hours 36 min ago
    you have got to be kidding me.  reward that slacker, childish behavior with a kiss?  seriously?  how do you feel affection for someone who makes your life so damn difficult?  who sees only the little pieces of the whole picture and bases his opinions and worldview on some of the incoming information, not all of it?  whose only goal in life is to make life easier for HIM, not the people around him-who lies, only does part of something at home, ignores those around him, comes and goes as he pleases, may or...
    >>> on Forum topic - Stepping outside the box to get a view through someone else's eyes

  • by: lauren07 - 4 hours 27 min ago
    I have BRF. I get so tired of being told to smile when I'm in a great mood;)
    >>> on Forum topic - "Looking angry vs Being angry"

  • by: kathy1208 - 5 hours 27 min ago
    I have had this experience with my husband.  He is like jekyll and hyde - can be sweet and warm and whatever but man if you catch him in a mood he can have a meltdown/tantrum over the dumbest thing.  How do you react to him when he acts unfavorably? I used to react. Say It upset me, justify my position, etc. I got to the point where I didnt even make it appear deliberate - I just quietly dropped everything, turned, and left the room. Basically it was like, you overreact over nothing and project it on ME,...
    >>> on Forum topic - My ADD Husband Tantrums like a Baby

  • by: Rosered - 5 hours 29 min ago
    Good point, Sunlight.  I feel pained when I read comments, especially from the "experts," in which I'm directed to do X, Y, or Z, because, the person says, obviously I haven't done that if my spouse is still exhibiting behaviors A, B, and C.
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?

  • by: I'm So Exhausted - 5 hours 32 min ago
    Hi C, *Wink Wink*  That wasn't the enemy, that was you :) Expectation:  A belief that is centered on the future.  A belief that someone will achieve something.   I most definitely have expectations.  Expectations that I will do better tomorrow than I did today.  Expectations that if someone tells me they will do something, that they will.  Expectations that my marriage partner will have sex with only me.  Expectations that my children will grow up to be fine upstanding citizens.   Now, there is...
    >>> on Forum topic - "Looking angry vs Being angry"

  • by: kathy1208 - 5 hours 45 min ago
    Yes, I just thank god for the least at the times he insists something (and it's wrong) and it's a basic fact, I can go look it up and show him. That stuff bothers me the most when I know that if he stopped and think for a second he'd have NO WAY to know if what he was saying is right - it is like they treat guesses and assumptions as PURE, ACCURATE, FACT and argue them as such to the death, no matter how much it doesn't matter and everyone else is telling them they're wrong and may have a...
    >>> on Forum topic - Husband is a Know it All

  • by: kathy1208 - 5 hours 50 min ago
    YES - the forgetting what he said thing - oh my gosh.  My husband, whatever "opinion" he blurts out in the moment, he has to be vehement and passionate about, even if its just a total whim of an opinion, and i know that many of his opinions are pure whims bc of the rate at which they change he forgets what they even were. Example: We bought three short shelves to stain and after we bought them we realized we wanted to buy a longer, fourth one for the other wall. I said - so I guess we should stain these...
    >>> on Forum topic - Husband is a Know it All

  • by: sunlight - 5 hours 56 min ago
    I know, Rosered, you don't. I don't think any number of wrongs add up to make a right, but ADHD discussions can spark strong emotions and when the fur flies it may deter some from posting. Of course the internet can be a brutal place and we're all supposed to be mature, but for anyone with low self-esteem, going through a particularly bad time, or particularly sensitive, ADHD or not, they may find some of the posts a little hard to take.
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?

  • by: sunlight - 6 hours 14 min ago
    OT Humor (or is it?) follows "Your face is like a hard cold stone. No one can tell what you are thinking." I have BRF Syndrome too, I work every day to overcome it. I do. I say it must be genetic and it's not my fault nor a personality nor a moral nor an ethical failing. But that doesn't really help. Deep down I know I will always have BRF and somebody will spot it and judge me. The world is cruel to those who are 'different'. So.... Am I the only person who remembers...
    >>> on Forum topic - "Looking angry vs Being angry"

  • by: frustratedinfla - 6 hours 14 min ago
    My DH is on Vyvanse and tried Adderall previously. I wonder if the stimulants are the right meds for him! He was solo moody on Adderall and Vyvanse seems to have a better affect on him but when he crashes in the afternoon, man I get the short end of the stick!
    >>> on Forum topic - Stimulant side effects

  • by: dedelight4 - 6 hours 17 min ago
    Yes, I've heard this too. I'll agree to the fact that my ADHD husband DOES know quite a few things. He has a PhD in music education, but it's the common sense things that are lacking. My daughters and I always get lectures on how something / ANYTHING is supposed to be, or get put together, etc.......and it can only go the way HE says it can. There have been MANY times he's been DEAD WRONG, but that doesn't stop him. When he GETS proven wrong by a professional on say, the air conditioning, he will blame his...
    >>> on Forum topic - Husband is a Know it All

  • by: frustratedinfla - 6 hours 17 min ago
    I agree hahahaha But I'll add something here, having a conversation with DH, I say what I wanted to say (the conversation was going great and we were actually talking) then he gets this blank stare at me and doesn't say a word! Then gets pissy and says "I have to finish my work" which is ADHD talk for its time for you to leave!
    >>> on Forum topic - An ADHD conversation moment

  • by: frustratedinfla - 6 hours 20 min ago
    So we went to the dr today to discuss meds. He basically feels 50 mg isn't therapeutic dose for him and when he takes the 30 in the afternoon, because he isn't reaching a good level during the day, the booster just isn't cutting the mustard. He's also been staying up till 1-4 am every night instead of going to bed. His response to that is "I don't have insomnia, I stay up as late as I want to and I go to bed when I want to!" Like these meds are designed to wear off when it's time for bed. So basically...
    >>> on Forum topic - Newbie needing support and advice

  • by: CatSuE - 6 hours 40 min ago
    My husband does that sort of thing, too, and to make it even worse, he can easily forget that he ever said something.  So he'll tell me to do something that doesn't completely make sense to me.  I'll ask him for clarification, which will irritate him, so I just go ahead and follow his directions, only to be met with being treated like an idiot because obviously he didn't mean that/what I did made no sense/he would never have given those directions. Or he does it about things that really don't matter.  ...
    >>> on Forum topic - Husband is a Know it All

  • by: tounces7 - 7 hours 52 min ago
    If it's only for a small number of specific individuals, then it's most likely not coming from ADHD. People with ADHD are still people, and they can still have a host of other problems outside of having ADHD itself.   A psychopath with ADHD does not murder people because he has ADHD, he murders people because he's a Psychopath.    Even if ADHD makes a certain characteristic, such as OCD, Bipolar, or even being Stupid, or whatever, WORSE, then it's still not an attribute associated with ADHD.   Certain...
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?

  • by: Rosered - 8 hours 45 min ago
    But what if, in some individuals' situations, the negative attribute is associated with ADHD?
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?

  • by: tounces7 - 8 hours 49 min ago
    Because we would rather not have negative attributes associated with ADD that are un-related to ADD itself. That creates Stereotypes.   
    >>> on Forum topic - Why do I feel like I'm on eggshells?