Recent Comments

  • by: Mapper - 7 min 58 sec ago
    Just as I predicted! Yes DH did go to work yesterday because he was going on about how he is back at making money and he can't take anymore days off. Hah! Wanna bet? He is going racing this weekend and probably won't be back until 9PM on Sunday night. He has to get up for work at 4AM and I'm sure he's not going to relax enough to go to bed before midnight on Sunday. He said he might just go in late on Monday then. Riiight...just like all those other days you were going to go in late! So here's my next...
  • by: pathfinder - 1 hour 24 min ago
    ADHD wife, If there is another man, she is keeping that from me.  I'm not sure I'm in a position to hear that until I get home if it is the case.  The family members and close family friends all find her actions equally strange.   I'm not sure what you mean when you say the military has left me with issues. If you are referring to my marriage, then yes, the time I have been required to be away has added to the relationship strain.  If you are referring to personally,  you may have some misconceptions...
  • by: smilingagain - 8 hours 31 min ago
    This doesn't sound great. Is there a man in the other state? I have adhd and I can't fathom your wife's actions. If she actually would leave you now, without really trying to make it work and to give your child the chance to grow up in an intact family, then this is a tough case. it sounds like she is either completely immature and selfish OR there is much more to this story and you were more angry than you've indicated here. if it is the former, you are probably out of luck. If it is the latter, there...
  • by: simonda - 12 hours 14 min ago
    I am sorry to hear about how hard it has been for you and your husband. Your story makes my fears seem more real. I am so worried that if we did decide to get married that things would just get worse. We don't have sex at all. We've used Viagra and that was the closest we came to having sex from beginning to end (climax). It didn't last long because even on Viagra, he lost his erection. I don't get it...I think it is a sensory issue because it feels "weird" to him and even if I'm just touching him with my...
  • by: dedelight4 - 12 hours 37 min ago
       Simonda, my ADHD husband behaves in the same way. He has always been sexually distant. He always felt awkward during sex, NEVER initiated it himself, and the rare occasions we did have it, it was over in less than a minute. Plus, he didn't put much effort into helping me have an orgasm after he was "finished". He also didn't like being tickled, or having a back rub, or being touched in most ways that the rest of us enjoy "touch". It was more irritating to him than pleasurable, which makes lovemaking a...
  • by: Djadechen - 12 hours 39 min ago
    Thank you for your comments.  You are right that his heart is in the right place.  What he does is illogical to me and out of synch with expectations.   I have tried talking to him, but it doesn't go very far.  He doesn't know what I'm talking about a lot of times.  Then, he would promise to do something and then forget.   We have good days and bad days, and I try hard to maintain a sane household.   Thank you again, I appreciate your thoughts.
  • by: ICanSeeClearlyNow - 13 hours 6 min ago
    Thank you for sharing your experience, Lauren.  I've read some of your other posts and the relief you felt after separating from your husband and am wondering if I will feel the same if it comes to this.  Did you ever give your husband an ultimatum about changes in behaviour, getting help, etc. or you would leave?  That's where I'm at now and desperately need a way to do it so I don't antagonize him and make the situation hostile.  My husband just keeps refusing to go to a doctor or to join me for marital...
  • by: george - 13 hours 26 min ago
    It was quite a labor of love, and completely consumed quite a number of weekends, plus many a night.  It was a complete technical upgrade (new server, new operating system, new version of the content management system, and a new design, which is the only thing anyone really notices.  It did not go without a some issues, as you pointed out to me on the very first evening, but most of the serious issues are now behind us (I hope).  Now I have to concentrate on my day job (which is usually my day and night...
  • by: simonda - 13 hours 50 min ago
    Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to my post. We have done several of the things you suggested, but I will definitely try a few of your ideas - such as calming music. I did just purchase your book "The ADHD Effect on Marriage" and am halfway through it. It has been very informative and helpful so far. I am wondering if it is not only anxiety, but a sensory issue as well...and him worrying how I will react if things "don't work" so to speak. I will talk with him more and ask him about his...
  • by: JJamieson - 14 hours 41 min ago
    I really hesitate in making armchair diagnosis for character disorders but...I'm going to chime in here with one anyway only because I've been involved with a woman who was diagnosed with one.  After only reading a few of lines into your post I started to get a sick feeling in my stomach.  This is the same visceral reaction I got when I was with this old girlfriend.  If my gut is telling me anything....it's saying that ADHD is not the overwhelming issue here.  I second another poster in thinking you should...

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