My husband and i have been married for almost 2 years now. I am sooo in love with him. Like every other couple we have had our ups and downs. Last year, he wasnt sure if he wanted to be married to me. We're both young and i knew what he was saying. As much as it hurt me, i gave him his space to figure things out. Things didnt go as smoothly because he had been with another woman during his 'questioning' period. He finaly came to realize that there was no one better then me, for him. I was pregnant and very emotional so it was a hard time but we got through it.
A month or so after having our son, i was still feeling like he was distancing his self from me and our son. It just didnt feel right, something felt off. So automaticaly i assumed there was someone else. He was always going out with his friends and leaving me to watch our son (regular thing). If he wasnt at work or out, hes playing video games. Not just regular play for an hour or so and stop. Im talking about hours and hours of video game playing. So im stuck sitting on the couch trying to stay occupied. He just wasnt paying attention to me like he use to. I felt unattractive no matter how many times he tried to lift my spirits by calling me beautiful. He had just joined the Army when we met so i have barley any time with him now we have a kid it just seems so much harder to have alone time.
I get so angry. He doenst really help around the house cleaning. doenst help with the baby. He does but very very rarely. I do appreciate what he does but when i bring up that he doesnt help enough he gets so down on himself. I hate doing that to him so i usualy keep things bottled up untill it just comes bursting out in tears and me being hurt. Which ends up making him feel inadequite. Or not good enough. It tears me up inside because i just know that thats not it.
I talked to my sister the other day and she had found out that her son has adhd. She was explaining to me how he would act, such as she would be talking to him he would look at her and after she was done saying something, he would say, "what did you say mom?" like he couldnt hear her at all. which my husband does. I cant talk to him while hes playing a game. I have to repeat myself so many times and i just felt like he was ignoring me. After she had told me everything, it all just clicked in my head. My husband has ADD.
I remember he told me he has ADD like when we first met. But knowing he SAID he has ADD is totaly different then realizing it effects our everyday life.
If i wouldnt have realized that my husband has ADD, i was really considering leaving him. I dont think i ever could bring myself to do that but thats what it was coming to. Im so glad i found this site.
I just want to know what wifes have done to get through this. Its so hard to deal with but i know people have dealt with it. And i dont want to leave my husband. Hes my bestfriend. I want to help him.
Anyones input would be greatly appreciated.