My DH has the tendency to continue along the path of destroying our relationship with his (anger issues),I just cannot comprehend as to why he gets sooo mad over"Everything" it is hard and nerve recking enough already to deal with his ADHD, but the anger issues is the main problem with us.one example:
I deal with the public everyday,that's in my job area where I serve the public,I met him while working one day, so he tends to feel that maybe I would meet a next person through my work criteria,he comes every morning during the week to get breakfast at my cafe,and then leaves,but everyday I dress almost the same,jeans and "white" top and a hat,so he somehow found the nerve to tell me through a text on Friday after our "big fight" that I am serving the public with tight jeans and tight top with make up on,ohhh,ho,,, I am sorry but what does he want me to wear? he has got to be bluffing!!! I don't know but he says that his lose link in his chain ,is me looking like that in the public and that I could "pick up" like that,Lol, he is insane.
Alright,so how it is that ,that was never a problem before,but suddenly "now", right,, I understand the concept between the two time zone the ADHD live's in "now and not now",but did that fall in to the same line,I really am not sure if anyone knows the answer to my question please answer.
I don't really think that was the main cause for our big fight on Friday,it was clear to me that he was having financial problems at his work and then took it out on me,maybe he really wanted to tell me something about my dress attire, but could not do it in the "not now" time zone.Or maybe he was trying to play the "blame game" again,either which way he knows that he is "not" what I thought he would be ,so it builds fear that I would find someone else,while with him,true but I won't do that!
Then suddenly I encountered that this is our 5 or 6 breakup over the 1 year of marriage,but we argue like every other 2 days over his "anger issues"that he brings ever so constant to the table,he texted me over this weekend after our "big fight" on Friday,and he would say weird things like this:
this is Saturday he texted me all this:
"I need to find someone to live with me here,you have your family, I don't have nothing/nobody"
"you are young, you could move on with your life,I think we need to give it a rest"
"I love you but can't live like a raccoon up here by my self"
right so I texted him back and agreed that we needed to give the relationship a rest, and then a couple of hours will pass and he would text:
this would be Sunday now next day,
"I love you bi**h"
"I am going fishing today to clear my head,I can't take the land lock,it is distracting me"
"we could work it out,I just need to get back in the sea"
Okay!!! it is clear to me that the time zone"now and not now" is the real deal when coming to ADHD,and that is really making me sick to my head! he can't make up his mind,he does not know what to say, how to say it, and what he should or should not do!! he is puzzle,in other words his meds is fishing,and he really can't do without the ocean.So then fish do whatever you need to help"you" that is important.But he gets so angry over "everything"
such a simple thing like my dress code! I am very decent and I don't dress swanky for work,but jeans are made to fit tight,and he finds it to be tight,how typical.