Fed up

Why is it Ok for him (he has ADHD) to forget everything, but if I forget something it's a catastrophe?  Why is it OK for him to feel overwhelmed because he has 1,000 thoughts running through his head, but it's not OK for me to feel overwhelmed? Because he has ADHD, I'm supposed to encourage him and give him praise (like I do with my kids-but wait, I'm sot supposed to treat him like a child).  Walk around on eggshells because of his anger.  But when do I get encouragement or any kind of gratitude?  When do I get support?  From him-never.  I feel like we all have to bend over backwards to help him cope with his ADHD.  We all have to be understanding.  Which in a way I get all of that.  I should be a more supportive loving wife but when do I get a supportive loving husband-I don't.  I'm so fed up.