Finding the right meds

Listened to an interesting session last night - the first of the series - and was delighted to hear that it's important to think about what the top few issues you see in your ADHD partner before deciding on the right medication. I've always been curious about this and I feel like a lot of docs and therapists who don't know ADHD/ADHD relationships well might not prescribe as effectively as they could. AND, I also think it's hard for docs to prescribe well when they do not hear from the partner (who knows the real deal about moodiness/impulsiivty etc,) As many with ADHD are, my husband was encouraged by me, two years into our marriage, 12 years ago, to see someone about being diagnosed with ADHD. He saw someone once who diagnosed him and then sent him to get meds from his primary care doc - Aderall was prescribed. No doubt, this medication made it easier to concentrate in long meetings at work, but I'm not really sure that that was a top issue I was encountering at home - impulsive behavior/erratic moods/anger/irritability/social issues (i.e. ability to sit in a room with others more easily and offer more give and take in the conversation vs. monopolizing. And, I'm also not certain that this type of ADHD medication doesn't amp up the irritability level of that person. Anyway, the point of this is that I'm curious to hear if this sounds like anyone else on here, or their partners, and if you've had good/bad experiences with medication that helps focus on this type of ADHD. He's now on Vyvance at the urging of another therapist (has been on for two weeks and likes it) but I'm wondering, based on last night's seminar, if an SSRI on top of this or instead of this might be better. And/or can these be taken together? Vyvance for help w/ focus during the hours you need to be super focused and an SSRI or something else for the mood piece. I know it's not my job to figure it all out (a big issue in our marriage) but as many in ADHD/non-ADHD partnerships likely know, it's often the non-ADHDer steering the ship when it comes to support ... nuff said. Thanks for thoughts.