FOOT+MOUTH=FIGHT!!! (how communication works in our marriage)

I try to communicate properly but the lack of forethought in my words, or the manner in which I inflect them, usually falls flat and leaves me with a my foot in my mouth, and we have a fit. I am angry how I expressed myself, my wife - the non-ADHD person, is sensitive because she is hurt and feels like she did something WRONG, and this instance ruins our entire day. 


If we could go on the a game show, teh way we communicate, would fail in 20 seconds.