I don't know how much I can take.

My husband and I have struggled financially for several years. He has gone from job to job. My mother came to live with us as support and it's good for me because she keeps me sane and she is a kind helpful person. My husband has taken advantage if her by getting her to put a car in her name and then it got repossessed. Put electricity in her name and he got behind so they came after her and she paid and even got tires for car and never paid. She cooks cleans and helps and I know normally mother in laws can be a nightmare but she is not. Still he throws it in my face that he's not happy because we should be alone. Truth is I don't want to live alone with him and we can't afford it. He is deceitful with his money and somehow thinks because he works and due to health issues I can't then he does whatever. He lies makes excuses and is cruel, I bite my tongue do I don't say something I regret. He is selfish  but yet truly thinks he always puts others first. He is spoiled and can't handle the simplest  thing. He can't get unemployment if he ever lost another job because he was deceitful and collected it when he was working and now he owes the state. He gets angry and I am very strong and I will look at him and say you don't scare me. I know that's wrong but he pushes. The worst thing of all for me is that I have long suffered with an addiction to opiates. I have struggled and relapsed twice during our marriage. I know now that stress and trying to be strong is a huge trigger for me. The last time I take full responsibility for except I can't get past the part my husband played in it. He had surgery and I have the common sense to know he would need pain meds. That's okay I don't need to know anything else out if sight out of mind. So I'm sitting there one night and he looks at me and asks what this med was that they gave him and that it made him feel weird and I said I can't believe you just said that.  Combine the thought that I know he had something and I can't take him anymore and there I . Luckily my mom realized and called me on it and I came clean and caught myself before I fell really hard. Thank God. My mom was angry because he acting like it was funny and he told her yeah she took my meds it's like she sniffs out the stuff. He then said like he was so smart that he put them in a Tylenol bottle. My mom was horrified and is not happy over his childish behavior. So now my husband is a trigger and how do I deal with that. He then was supposed to go to work but of course he was wrong and he had to miss two weeks of work and it's everyone else's fault. I'm angry because I had to borrow from my uncle to pay a bill and I get a call that he bought a truck. Are you serious! I couldn't believe he had no thought for anyone but himself. I had it and made him leave for a few days. I am going to go to counseling and let him come home. He won't leave me alone and I told him that we are in trouble but it's like he is desperate and thinks I'm mean and I should let go and I just don't want him to touch me. He tries to make me look irrational and mean. I'm sorry this was so long. I just need someone to tell me that it's okay to walk away.