Hi, I just found this site and started reading peoples posts. It brings me confort to know i'm not the only person dealing with a spouse diagnosed with ADD. I've been married for over 10yrs and always new there was something wrong with my relationship with my husband. He is a very passive person and avoids conflict if at all possible. We do not communicate well at all. I', constantly reminding him about what weve talked about plans weve made and soooo on. It got to the point where I have become very angry I do all the bills, work full time , plan everything do all the shopping I have a son from a previous marrage and my husband has very little interaction with him. He has two kids that he wouldnt have much to do with if I didn't ecourage that. I decided a few months ago to go to counciling for my anger, I felt like there was something wrong with me I should me content with the fact my husband works, he's always home on time ( but still late for dinner every night) little things that shouldn't drive me crazy did. I felt and still do feel that I pull the load all by myself. My husband agreed to go to counciling also and was quickly diagnosed with a severe case of ADD. He was put on medication and for a while I thought wow! he's a whole new man. but soon old behaviors came back. The lack of communication, and interest in our family makes me feel soo lonely, Our Dr. increased his medication and again helped some for a little while. My husband treats me like I want overnight change and yes I guess I do but after reading the post I realize thats not going to happen. I just wish I could see some continuous change. He says I get frustrated and angry because everything is always about me. And he says he don't understand what the big deal is. I'm lonely I want someone to talk to i feel so hopeless. After being put on his meds i allowed him to take over three of the bills to take some of the load off me after a couple months he was late on my credit card i added him too. I was very upset, he called and got the late charges dropped and they didnt raise my interest but he couldn't understand why i was upset. the next month he wanted a pat on the back because he paid that bill on time but one of the other three was, he looked at that as he did ok since it wasnt the same bill, and beside give me a break you know how long its been since ive had to do this stuff. I'm so tired of feeling like him mommy. (it has killed my desire for sex with him, again its just another job on my plate. He's always quiet when asked whatcha thinking about its a distant stare nothing he says. I wish for one day of not having to think about anything bills ect.
I need some hope or I'm out this year!