New way to respond

Last night my spouse asked if we can "afford" for him and our son to attend the construction convention they have attended the past 2 years in February.  

My INTERNAL response was jumping up and ranting, What do you mean afford - How many times have I said I do not want to talk business and finances after 9 pm -  Have you even looked at our financial status - even once - since you got mad AT ME about the past dues taxes - and on and on and on.

Rather, I sighed and said it was too late in the day for me to think about finances.

This morning I said to him "I think the real question is do you guys want to attend the convention.  Is it beneficial?  Do you get something from it?  If so, we just need to plan it.  And work out the financial end in advance."

And he said, yes, they wanted to go.

Just wanted to mention this is all about me here in this post.  Just want to mention it is incredibly difficult to do this in this way.  Just want to mention that my own brain is focusing on me and what I do and what I want.  

This is some really hard stuff.