Think husband has ADHD

I have been with my husband for thirteen years and married for five. Reading posts , I think that he has ADHD. He has every symptom mentioned and is getting increasingly difficult to cope with. Due to his angry outbursts, bad behaviour and lack of apologies , I am in constant danger of being isolated from family and friends. He is like Jekyll and Hyde. One minute kind, loving and fun to be with the next angry about everything in his life and blaming everyone else for making him angry. I bear the brunt of it and have gone from being a bright, bubbly , happy person to being a nervous wreck. I have an extremely responsible job as a lawyer and am constantly in fear of him phoning and being abusive to me or humiliating me in front of staff and clients.  He is completely reckless money wise and says he hates the fact that I am responsible and don, t push boundaries.He  thinks that all rules are there to be broken. He does not take responsibility for anything and denies what has been said. I had a miscarriage recently and ended up at the hospital on my own despite frequent calls to him. He denied I had called him or sent texts and when I showed him , he accused me of ambushing him. My parents are desperate for me to leave him and I get no support from his parents . His adoptive mother thinks the sun shines out of him while his adoptive father, who has asperger,s could not care less. They think that I should be grateful?!that when he has  had a tantrum and thrown things  at me that he has never actually hit me. I do feel sorry for my husband and I do love the nice man but I am exhausted with him and fed up going to bed every night on an argument. I am fed up not having people round because they are nervous of his behaviour and I,m fed up with him acting like a toddler.  I do not know what to do. Social situations and holidays are turning into a nightmare. I spoke with his aunt this morning and she told me that he was always loud, attention seeking and hyper as a child and as a teenager was always walking out of jobs , friendships and relationships and in her opinion hasn.t changed. She also said that his patents would never admit anything could be wrong with either him or his sister. She also said that it was due to his anger that his sister stopped all contact with him He says he has no idea why. I would like to get him to a doctor to see if he does have and has had ADHD as a child but not sure how to get him there. I fear for my marriage and am not sure how my husband would cope if I ended it.