Learning Differently


ADHD & Marriage - Weekly Marriage Tip - August 10, 2012

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“Kids with Learning Disabilities are smart.  They just Learn Differently.”.

- Newspaper quote my daughter had on her bulletin board growing up


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Learning Differently

My daughter is now 21 and fabulous.  But growing up with both ADHD (inattentive) and a math learning disability meant that she experienced her share of struggles.  Some of the pressure came from other kids – “why can’t you add or multiply better?” and “why can’t you remember to turn in your homework?” and some came from teachers.

We were lucky – she was diagnosed early, and we had many years to work with her to help her understand that she is not just her symptoms – that she was/is smart and talented, and that her symptoms could be managed so they didn’t impede her ability to follow her dreams.

People with learning disabilities (including ADHD) really DO learn and “do” differently.  In order to thrive they often need to set up a system that helps them overcome their symptoms in a way that a parent or a spouse simply can’t imagine because it wouldn’t be logical or work for them.  When I tell adults with ADHD “don’t try harder, try differently” this is what I’m referring to.  You ARE different.  You DO learn differently.  Trying harder in ways that work for others might not work for you.  So set up reminder and planning systems that are logical for the way your ADHD mind works.  Doing it in whatever way works best for you can make all the difference when you want to show the world how smart or talented or special you are because you really do learn – and do – differently.

For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
If you or your spouse has ADHD, please join our forum at www.adhdmarriage.com to ask your questions and learn from others who share your issues.  In addition, you'll find in-depth essays to help you learn how to thrive in a marriage affected by ADHD.
Hope to hear from you there!
Melissa Orlov

© 2012 Melissa Orlov