“People grow apart when they don’t share what’s happening to them as they grow.” - Martha Beck
Relationship disconnection is a common issue these days – whether caused by being too busy and stressed, or by ADHD symptomatic behaviors such as distraction, or both. One way to keep from “growing apart” is to reach out to your partner on a regular basis and share an inner thought or, if you prefer, ask him/her about something they are feeling or interested in. If you have ADHD, you might need to literally schedule reminders to do this – but it will be worth the effort. Partners love to know they are being thought of. Sharing your thoughts about what excites you right now, or what you are “mulling” is an impressive, and appreciated, way to stay connected.
This all assumes, of course, that your relationship is “safe” enough to be able to share your feelings. If it isn’t, start first by improving the tenor of your relationship – perhaps with the help of a therapist.
For those in marriages impacted by ADHD
You can find great resources for couples impacted by ADHD at my marriage and ADHD website, including: a free online treatment overview; free downloadable chapters of my books; a community forum with other couples facing similar issues; a large number of blog posts on various topics; referrals; and my very popular ADHD Effect In-Depth Couples' Seminar. This eight-session seminar has helped many couples turn around their relationship, and is given by phone, so anyone may participate.
Adult ADHD can have a huge impact on your relationship. Please take a moment to investigate the information available to you. It can literally change your life!