Forum topic: Wife starts Ritalin tomorrow

This is the third day of my wife taking Ritalin.

Good results for days 1 & 2. Within 30 to 40 minutes of first use, my wife seemed to me noticeably more relaxed and "here." Her morning shower took half the time it normally does. I wasn't flooded with text messages while she was at work the way I often am - a couple of messages about the effects of the Ritalin, that was about it. She said she was still distracted at work in the morning but in the afternoon felt more focussed. At home in the evening, she was calmer, more direct and more "solid."

Day 2, I could tell she hadn't taken Ritalin first thing because her shower time doubled back up to its usual. Almost no text messages from her that day, and in the evening she reported that she could tell how much more focussed and less distracted she was at work. She was more relaxed and playful than I've seen in a long time.

Today, Saturday, day 3, she spent the morning in bed and is getting off to an easy start this afternoon (including spontaneous cleaning!).

My own reactions have surprised me. On day 1, I was tensely anticipating results and ended up pleasantly surprised by the changes. Yesterday, day 2, I woke up feeling a load of sadness that I think I've been suppressing for a while. I spent half the day feeling deeply sad, then napped and woke with an eagerness to have fun with my wife that I haven't felt in years. We ended up having a really fun evening like we haven't had in years, and I rediscovered my enjoyment of caring for her, instead of it being the burden I've felt it as for years. This morning, day 3, I woke up with fresh insight into how my responses to her behaviour affected her over the years, and recommitted myself to continue working on myself as I have done since realising I misinterpreted her behaviour all these years. I've been really surprised at how much more room I feel now to improve. It really is a feeling of increased space in our relationship.

Here's to continuing the work.