Married 20 yrs to an ADD husband. We put the symptoms of ADD together shortly after our son was treated for ADD. I feel like a large part of my personality has been shut down ( the adventurous, fun side) so I can be the responsible one when he spontaneously decides on a new idea. He never follows a plan and is always changing family plans by coming up with a new idea of his own. I feel like I'm always the one to pick up the loose ends. (packing, details, etc.) After 20 yrs. I want to live with my husband as a partner and not always holding my breath to see what his next adventure will be. I want to have a little stability in life and not always wondering what I need to handle next. Does anyone else feel the same way after many yrs. of marriage?