Is this common in ADHD relationships? Has it happened to you before and how do you deal it?
We dated for about 2 years before getting married. During periods of high stress, which also means frequent alcohol use, he will say he wants out of the relationship so this is nothing new. He has a tendency to say things he doesn't really mean (ADHD). Usually at some point the next day, usually by the evening, he starts coming back to his usual self. We both hold a high regard for the sacredness of marriage, and both feel that our love and trust for each other is unbreakable. We hold the same views about marriage - it is binding for a reason. You work through your issues, and it's not easy.
Since we've gotten married (coming up on 1 year), there have been a couple stressful periods where he has said he wants a divorce during an angry outburst. He has never truly meant it before... the other day he said it again. This time felt different, he was initially angry but then got sad. I think he took off his wedding ring. He said he has been abusing me and he can't do that to me anymore. He had plans to hang out with a friend last night so I haven't really talked to him. He's been under incredible stress at work, and I feel like he's not thinking properly. The day before he said he wanted a divorce, we talked about how we can get through anything together, and how we as a couple were made for it. Yesterday he mentioned he doesn't feel like anything is real. I really don't want our relationship to end, we have so much love and understanding for each other and have gotten so much better as a couple throughout the years. I'm worried that this time he means it...but it would be so out of character if he does. We have a lot to work on, but I feel like we're just getting started...it's not like we've exhausted options in any way.