ADHD Rock Bottom

I am a professional, married man with 2 kids.  I love my family more than my own life itself.  They are everything that I ever imagined a family should be to me as I had no real image of family growing up.  My impulsivity and anger outbursts have caused me to have frequent problems.  In May, my ADHD finally became my resource for me to hit rock bottom. While at work, I was goofing around with a freeze spray that accidentally struck a co-worker in an unacceptable physical location.  I was NOT aware that this had happened until I was called to the carpet 4 days later.  The same day that this happened, a client presented to our work location 5 minutes before closing time with a big issue and I made my dissatisfaction known to my co-workers by saying, "WTF?!?" out loud.  Because of these infractions, I was forced to resign from my position immediately in lieu of termination.  My next week was full of sadness and deep depression.  I had let my wife and children down.  I jumped to the computer to find a new job, all while considering ending my own life in order to make theirs easier.  I don't feel suicidal and never had a real was a situational idea because of what was going on and how deep my depression was at this time.  My wife, 3 months later,still doesn't believe that I have told her the whole story because I haven't been completely forthcoming with things in the past (defense mechanism from my ADHD).  The thing is, I was completely honest with her this time. I am now saddened that my previous behaviors have caused this mistrust.  I love my wife so much!  She has urged me over the years to learn more about ADHD both for myself and our now 10 year old son who also has ADHD but, I have put it off and put it off.   Since all of this, she has withdrawn from me, barely speaks to me unless it has to do with our business venture or the scheduling with the kids. She "Phubs" me, spending hours on her phone checking Facebook and Pinterest. She "goes out with the girls" who have all suddenly created a Snapchat group, but lets me know about it a few hours prior.  I feel like this is another way for her to pull away.  She tells me that I need to do something because our marriage is hanging on by a thread. When I try to tell her about what I am learning, she gets angry with me and says "I have been doing this research for 13 years, where have you been?"  My wake up call has happened!!  I am trying desperately now, because I love her, because I love our 2 beautiful children!  I wish I had tried sooner, that I had listened to her.  I feel like it is too late, but I don't want it to be, and I think she doesn't either.  But she won't talk to me about it...Today, while at my new job that is 2.5 hours away from home, I was researching Melissa Orlov's seminar.  I sent my wife a message asking if she would do it with me.  Silence.  Please help!!! Anyone!!!