I've been with my OH for 2 years and living together for 6 months. We had a rough first year and broke up a couple of times but this time, it's "for real" and he's 100% in. He had always made a joke of being ADD and OCD but when a co-worker came to me and shared a book about ADHD and said she thought that my OH might have it, I really started taking it seriously. I started reading (still reading) The ADHD Effect on Marriage so I can learn more about it and how it affects or could affect our relationship BEFORE it goes sour. We have identified that he probably IS ADHD albeit undiagnosed at this time. Once his insurance kicks in, we plan to get him in for an actual diagnosis and begin treatment.
Before he moved in, he used to smoke and drink and smoke marijuana. Now, he's quit smoking and barely drinks but when he conquers one addiction, another one pops up. Now, he drinks coffee non-stop and smokes pot 1-3 times a day. He says it helps him focus. It does not make him slow and dopy like your typical "pot-head". In fact, I can barely tell the difference between when he's smoked and when he hasn't other than when having a conversation he tends to get off topic a lot!
I can't imagine that either of these "self-medicating" remedies are good for him? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.