Hi. Long time reader, first time poster, so I sincerely apologize if this post went into the wrong subgroup on the forum.
Let me introduce myself: I'm a 27 year old man, from Sweden, diagnosed with ADHD - as well as post-traumatic stress disorder and social phobia (and the two are, by the way, undergoing very good progress) - and I recently participated in an intense six month ADD/ADHD therapeutic group meeting (with lots and lots of exercises in mindfulness).
I'd like to share (an improved summary of) my "thought notes" with you all, so here they are:
"I wish that you somehow could share my reality, to understand my world, the same way as I'm forced to live in yours.
I wish that you, if only for a day, could feel this whirlwind inside of me, and the frustration which submerges when I can't follow its movement.
I wish you could feel this restlessness which quivers deep inside, which drives you crazy as you suppress it.
I wish that you could understand that every time you try to slow down my pace, or try to stop me, I completely fall apart.
It feels like I have a weight around my body. I feel trapped, suffocated, and just want to break free.
I must fly freely at my own pace, otherwise I fall down.
I would like you to understand that it's not because of malice or laziness that I can't handle certain situations, or deal with different things, and that every time I lose, or forget, things, it's already a complete failure by me.
I wish you could understand my frustration when I become interrupted, because every time that I loose track, I can't find my way back.
I'm sorry I can't listen to you; my thoughts fly away to unknown destinations. I can't stop them, no matter how hard I try.
I wish every time you ask what the matter is, have faith in my explanation: that I really don't know, that the answer is hidden… even for me.
Something's alive inside of me, something which I can't control or stop; which I every day try to control, just to function "normally."
Sometimes I wish it was visible on the outside, that it was carved into my forehead, as a reminder for you that I don't function the same way as you do, so that you remember that every time I make you upset or frustrated, I've already done the best I can...
… but couldn't reach through to you…
… and that no one's ever as sorry as I am."