Am I INSANE?! Vent.

Sorry everybody, I have a quick vent. Reminder I am the non ADHD partner. Well, to be honest I definitely have a minor version of it, but nothing like true blue adhders have.  For those of you with adhd/add and are treating it guns a 'blazing, you have my deepest respect!!! 

My boyfriend and I are both home today. I just left for two hours. Came back, walked into my studio, [ we each have our own little room for work and stuff ] and noticed he had been borrowing my printer in there. No problem. Noticed something dark on the floor. It was a mini human TURD.  [He's been doing....house stuff? in the nude all day. Don't ask. ] He said he is a 'fast squatter', he had to squat down to reach the printer. He said he  was going to clean it up, but got distracted. 

He is in a fine mood, toodling around all day, nothing wrong with a little turd, hahaha...I didn't react but asked him if he was a monkey.  He cleaned it up once I pointed it out! I thought the dog had had an accident!

Seriously though, a question...

Am I INSANE?!!

Who is crazier, me or him?! 

A TURD?!!

Agh!

Thanks for listening. Yikes.  

Nope you ain't crazy.

I've long said I know what my bottom line is, and I think my guy knows what my bottom line is.  But I just might have to add "turds on the floor" to my short list of intolerable behavior. 

wow

A turd on the floor? Wow.

I can relate, though. My ADD wife once left a soiled, bloody pad under the sink. I'm not sure how long it was there, resting on top of the extra rolls of toilet paper and soap refills and cleaning supplies. But I found it. I'm not squeamish around girly products, but this really grossed me out. At least it was dry. It looked like a piece of medical waste.

The question you're probably asking yourself is: will this ever change? I know that's what I ask myself. So far, things with my wife have changed somewhat. But clearly not enough.

We had actually talked about her moving out, and something in my heart just dropped when she actually seemed to collaborate on this plan. On the one hand, I should be thrilled! No more metaphorical dirty pads under the sink! But after nine years of a relationship (the last three being married), I also found myself struck by fear. I wish I could ditch the fear and just move on without her, and live with someone who didn't make such a mess or constantly lose jobs.

Anyway, thanks for reading my post "On Guilt..." and replying to it.

 

 

No...but isn't it amazing how

No...but isn't it amazing how insane they can make us feel for being upset about something such as this? I can't say my DH has ever done anything along these lines, but he has done some things that I wonder why I am the only person who is bothered by it and it scares me that he isn't. It does make you feel crazy. I think that wears me down the most...the insinuation that I am crazy because I have a belief that doesn't match his.

Wow...

That goodness this is NOT a common trait amongst us ADDer's. First line of defense... At least put your drawers on.

I would have been SO EMBARASSED that my Hyper-Focus would have unleashed in Full Force to prevent an incident like this from coming to light.

But (Pun Intended) that's just me...

YYZ

ADHD and Fully House Broken

I second that "Ewwwwwwww..."  I can't imagine that.  I was potty-trained before I was 2, and I've never looked back.

My first ADHD psychiatrist, noting that certain behaviors can be taught as lifelong habits which override ADHD, said to me, "Well, you don't forget to brush your teeth or wipe your butt, do you?"  Hell, no!

How you maintained your zen in the face of unspeakable, tiny, brown horror, I have no idea.  Must have been a surreal moment for you. 

Maybe this is distraction.  Maybe it's just an extension of a gross "guy" habit, like passing gas.  Maybe it's just a one-time incident (HOPEFULLY!!!).  Why you had to ASK HIM to pick up HIS EXCREMENT from the floor, I can't even imagine.  "Quick squatter?"  What the hell does that mean?  I can squat, and turds don't shoot out when I do.  Like YYZ, I can't begin to envision the humiliation I would feel, and how quickly I'd scramble to clean up.

Please don't feel that that is representative of ADHDers.  What your boyfriend did was appalling.  You're not crazy.  No one likes poo!

 

 

 

 

Funny my adhd son never

Funny my adhd son never remembers to brush his teeth unless we tell him.lol but this is totally unacceptable behavior. Your bf needs some help

Brushing teeth

Not on the same level as what you described but....

When I first started talking to my husband, he had like 4 teeth and they were all lose and crooked. I didn't even understand how he could talk clearly. I made him get a job with benefits and he got his few last teeth pulled and got dentures. I found out he had never gotten into brushing his teeth regularly. Now he leaves his dentures in 24/7 and never cleans them.

My ADD daughter (my husband is her stepfather) never brushed her teeth either. She's had to have a bunch pulled and she's only 30.

But they both know where to poop!

You and YYZ crack me up! I

You and YYZ crack me up! I guess I would have to jump on this to point out it isn't ADHD that causes this 'issue' too if I were you guys...you get enough of a bad rap without being accused of needing diapers when you clean house. :-P

My daughter does not brush her teeth unless I remind her most of the time. She does not shower as often as she should either..maybe 3 times a week..and she just turned 13. I am more convinced everyday that she has ADHD just like her Daddy. Today I asked her to hand me something...just asked in a normal "hand me my phone" tone and she acted as if I had devil horns coming from my head and I yelled it at the top of my lungs. I was shocked at her reaction to my simple request..."My God Mom! Do you have to ask so mean!??" I just walked off and shook my head and said nothing...but I thought to myself "I'm going to run away from home someday".

I never thought the "Poop" thread would go this far...

Laughter is good for the soul :D

My sweet DD2 would never brush her teeth or take a shower either... Wow... I don't remember being that way as a kid, but maybe I'll ask my mom :) I have a reminder in my iPhone that tells me to put my pants on before I begin the mundane housework. Maybe he wants to get out of doing housework? Hmmmm... 

YYZ

so great to see im not alone,

so great to see im not alone, with the kids who dont brush their teeth..lolol.. we just spent 5000 on braces so we are ALWAYS!! on him to brush his teeth,i dont want thismoney to go down the drain...so i sped most the day telling him to brush his teeth hopefullt it will stick,,lol

 

wow,my son would do the same exact thing prior to meds... flip out for the smallest of things, (like asking for the phone) everything was a battle (most things still are) but at least i can talk to him for more than 5 minutes without him cryng about something..(yes, at 13 he cries and has tantrums more than my 5 year old..) I wish you guys could all come over for dinner one day..lolol...would love to just spend the day talking with people who understand my struggles.

Crying... Interesting to me...

I'll post more later, but I've got a huge list of To-Do's today. I was a Very sensitive kid when I was growing up. At age 5, I had an Evil Step-Dad who was never physically abusive, but was verbally abuse, name calling and belittlng me. At age 13, he made me cry, but that time was different. I realized it was Him and I was pissed off that I would let him get to me. I told myself that day that I would never give anyone that satisfaction again. I have cried 2 times since that day... I've gotten slightly tearie sometimes, but only all out cried the 2 times. Unhealthy coping skill #1. I don't show emotions... YYZ

Poop on floor, the ultimate relationship metaphor

Hey everybody,

 I have to admit I'm glad this thread has gone so long. Pretty much every single person who has heard le tale of poo has had the same reaction. As in, wtf??!!!! These reactions have bolstered my sense of reality, believe me. 

 Using distractibility as an excuse for leaving poop in the house is a total insult to adhd folks, in my opinion! 

 fyi I have left my own home and my poopy monkey boyfriend. Arranged for an intervention of sorts and supposedly his pals are moving him out before I get back in a week. I told them, sorry, but it's better them than me finding a bunch of strangers to kick him out. Ugh. No, I'm not worried about violence  from my guy. A little worried about my house. I tried to figure out the least hideous of hideous exit plans. I love my guy but couldn't take the freaking insanity. That poo on the floor was the icing on the cake - bwah! sorry, can't help joke. It really was the poop de graz - bah! Another bad joke, sorry. 

 Thank you for supporting my fight for sanity! xo

rara avis

 

Sherri, I have threatened to run away too

Hehehehe...ok so maybe its not so funny, but I have threatened to "run away and join the circus"!  Lets face it I have had perfect training, especially when my son (hes 15 and ADHD) is totally pushing my buttons.  If I can handle my sons hyper ness (my husband is his SD) and my husbands mood swings...lion taming doesn't seem all that bad!

 

Run away!!! (Brave Sir Robin ran away)

There were days when I thought I would go to a boardwalk somewhere and make balloon animals for kids :)

But since boardwalks are chaotic places, I'd end up running away from there too. These escapes always sound good, but are flawed because they do not take into account all of the details. Oh well... It is fun to think of these places :)


 

YYZ