Anyone any help or advice ?

Hello All

I can not be alone in wondering why there is not more help and support for adults with ADHD ? My partners behaviours are so extreme and Intolerable and I am at a loss where to turn anymore. If his emotional and physical extremes were caused by a brain tumour, dementia or psychiatric issues there would be neurologists, oncologists and psychiatrists not to mention the family doctor to start with to turn to. If he were a child ,teachers , TAs and school counsellors but for an adult that appears to the average acquaintance like a functional intelligent person there seems no where to go . I have tried for five years to get him diagnosed but he finds every excuse under the sun to delay . The charity Mind and woman's aid both say the same thing he needs to stand up and take responsibility and if he won't I should leave as he is emotionally , verbally and mentally abusive . But what if you can't leave , what if your financial and practical life prevents that for now , what and where to turn ?? Does anyone know something I don't for here in the UK ? I understand a lot of the contributers on here seem based in the USA . I am at a very low point where I can see very little future his and my lives are wrecked by this condition , our relationship in tatters . My closest two confidants at a loss what to say anymore , I dread being in public with him or at home alone with him  to be honest , the only time I feel anything like me is when I am out in my car or with my friends , where I can at least pretend for a moment or two my life isn't all ADHD !