Baby Steps.....

After coming to the point of almost being totally mentally shot. I finally found this site started reading everything on it. Ordered the book and am reading it. Thank God! Today when my ADHD (hugely hyper & unpredictable) husband were shopping and I was talking to him about what we should get, turned around to realize I was talking to myself because he was nowhere to be seen, I could say to myself "it's the ADHD". Instead of feeling disrespected and angry. I chose what I WANTED and continued shopping. My anger has been all consuming, and today I didn't have to get mad. It's so freeing, to say to myself, "this is my boundry, if you disappear constantly, I'm not looking all over the store for you, to ask for your input, I'm going to continue shopping and I'll choose things without you." and be able to say that to myself in a calm sane, not nasty way. It doesnt sound like much, but it was a first huge step for me. And I saw a tiny pinpoint of light, looking up out of that ugly black hole I've been living in.