The Bad Boys (and Girls)

This is not about ADHD or ADD.  But I am trying to figure out what is wrong in my life by journaling here.  Lauren's post made me start thinking about this topic.  

I was attracted to bad boys. A number of them.  They are always "cute" and not boring in some ways, even if it is just their over-confident smiles and flirty ways.  They are fun and impulsive and made us laugh.  Sometimes these bad boys have nice cars and muscles and a devil may care attitude that, to a young woman, seems to be the guy of her dreams.  

These bad boys (and some feisty, sexy girls) lose their luster as we age in a relationship.  As we mature in experience with commitment and family and growing together, the "looks" and  personality of a person does not work like it did when we were dating and going to parties.  At this age, I am very leery of men and women who are TOO personable and confident, showy and loud - the drama queens and the showboat--- those people who are or try to be popular with their personality.  

As a mature woman, I do not trust the peacocks or the monkeys.  I STRONGLY choose the loyal dog who at the end, you realize has been your best friend and always greeted you with exuberance and was a constant, consistent, devoted pal. Cuteness does not last. 

Google: What makes a bad boy.  Why are the bad boys and bad girls more alluring to us? There is quite a bit of information.  It seems THIS is more of my problem with H than his ADD.  

Who we are is not our talents, abilities and thoughts. We ARE the choices we make. I was living in a world created by romance novels, rock music and religion, trying to MAKE something work that was not working.  I had chosen to pretend my way into a life that I thought I could sustain.  It's not working for me, Phil.  

Eyes wide open.


The more psychopathic or narcissistic you are, the better you are at conning people into thinking you’re actually a good person.  The Good Men Project