The beginning of the final breakup.Marriage at the end.

So maybe I have made excuses and maybe I have enable him and tried to save my marriage,but what can I say now I have given it 2 years and one month and it was a total waste of my effort/time.Who knows what to expect when you now meet someone and that moment presents itself and BOOM!!!!! YOU ARE IN LOVE.Head over heels in love.Some may think as they read my threads"ah,here she goes again".but I think that I reached the breaking point in my marriage.I tried to end it with him for the longest now I can remember, and now our time has come to an end.I wrote a blog on "my birthday"in 2011 on how he ruined my birthday.That same thing has come back to hunt me down.Turns out my husband is quit the cheater and manipulator,besides being a total wreck.I put up with all his abuse verbally and mentally and that physically put me down many times where I could not think straight,or work right and more.I know for a fact that I was the one holding us from falling apart.Whatever he did that was out of the ordinary I accepted,whatever he told me that was out of context I let it be.I just should not have let him cross certain lines over and over again.As time moved along he became too comfortable with his wrong doings and I stayed and just watched it happened that he just continued and continued.

Today now presently we are no longer together since last week I caught him in a cheating act and confronted him about it and ever since then he went in to hiding.The same girl he was with on the night of my birthday he tried to link up back with her and she came to me and told me everything.Shame has driven him in to hiding from me.I stopped and think to myself what a loser,I am the only fool to put up with all this non-sense and yet he betrayed me like this.I am not at all shock,I expected this,I don't think he expected it.I told him to bring my belongings I have over at his place and he would not bring them.I know that this his way of not letting go at the time but this time it just would not work.He is not taking this seriously,he can't even face me and talk about it.I really don't give a sh-t he if does not want to talk about it because really,there is nothing left to say besides goodbye.

I know that for the longest time I have been saying soo much and not doing anything to change this situation that I am in.Now I am making change and moving forward whatever he would try he no longer have me where he always wanted me,I have had it with all the games and foolish behaviors,ADHD or not,this is not the way a relationship should be.After looking back at all the situations and problems he gave me,he is not worthy of me.

lovehurts.

got back all my stuff.

Someone told me on another thread that I am making excuses to stay with this man.Well that is so true.I have been making to many excuses for the entire time we were together.My car was the biggest excuse.I always let him fix my car and then say"the car is the reason I can't leave yet"it was true to some point,but it also was an excuse for me to hold on to him forgetting the man I was with.My car has a problem right now again, and today I dropped it off at a garage and paid to get it fix.

after all the things he put me through,after all the fighting,cursing,chasing,belittling,and the mood swings the tantrums the anger issues,I just let him be.I let him ride me for 2 years and one month like a donkey or a mule.Well he would have to find someone else to ride like a donkey!!!! he brought back all my clothes and shoes I had over at his place,but not after he gave me a hard time to get them back telling me he left them in front my door step and someone must have passed and pick them up.liar!!! he lies about everything,gambles heavily,looks at porn religiously and smokes pot all the time.I let these things go on for the last 2 years plus and if I was to even breath in his way he would over power me with his shouting and cursing-constant chasing me like a dog.

I will be damn to spend another year with this man,happiness awaits me at the other end of the street,patience and virtue lingers in me,my whole entire routine is changing for the better,I would become me again.Wish me luck.

lovehurts.