Being "very critical" (when I could have ended up in the ER!)

We are getting some major home renovations done this week and we had to pack up all of the clutter so people we hired could move everything into a portable storage unit.  I started boxing books a month ago, but I am working this summer and my wife is off.  I  expressed concern during the course of the last month that we would not  be ready.  This was based on previous experiences, such as packing for moving a 3 in the morning and then leaving a bunch of stuff behind--in a different state!  Also, part of the reasons she did not get more packing done was because she was too focused on fighting with the kids about why they weren't helping.  Granted, the kids should help.  But we had a deadline, and it had to get done.  (BTW, I discovered how our son had gotten around his chore of shredding papers by attempting to burn them--in a plastic cooler, under the wooden deck and the propane grill!)

On Friday, the portable storage unit was supposed to be delivered, but they had it backwards on the truck.  I found out about it when I got home, but she was not there.  So I called her to ask why this happened.  I was confused about why anyone would want the doors facing the back of the driveway and not the front.  Her phone dropped the call during the conversation.  I did not say she did anything wrong--I just wanted to figure out what the company had told her.  But I was "attacking" her.

On Friday night, I was about to go to sleep and I noticed that there was a very large pile of clothes on our bed.  I just said to myself, "Oh, there is still stuff on the bed."  My wife was in the bathroom and overheard.  She lashed out at me because I was being over critical.  When I tried to point out that I had just reacted to something I noticed and did not say anything thing like "Why did you leave all this stuff on our bed?", she then claimed that she was venting because I had  been too critical all week.  I had always complained that she was focusing on the wrong thing.  I admit I did express some frustration that she was cleaning the porch when we needed to clear the living room and dining room.  She was able to fit some of the stuff from those rooms onto the porch.

Around 8:00 on Saturday, I got back from the store.  I was bringing in groceries and she had not fed the pets (they usually eat at 6:00).  I got a bit upset that she was not helping with the groceries and I was expected to feed the pets as well.  I then asked, "When are we going to start dinner?"  She snapped at me for being critical.  I pointed out that I asked when WE were going to start dinner--not when she was going to.  Nor did I complain, "Why didn't you cook dinner?"  I wound up going for a 30 minute walk until she would treat me with civility.  Again, she claimed it was because I had been too critical during the week.

Sunday morning, they redelivered the storage unit.  There was a low hanging, not in use wire that was in the way.  While she was trying to use a very large piece of wood to lift the wire out of the way, she absent mindedly swung it and almost him me in the head.  I did not get angry, but naturally I was surprised expressed my shock (Something along the lines of, "Woah!  Look out!")   Again, she started yelling at me about being critical.  She later said that if I think she has ADHD then I should understand this.  I pointed out that yes, I understood that she was confused, but she could have apologized after she calmed down and realized that she had almost sent me to the ER.

The people we hired to move things came at 2:00.  We were still packing, of course.