Book very informative but made me sad

I appreciate the book very much. It helped me a lot to know that other couples were struggling with the same type of issues. But it has also made me sad, and I have not finished reading it. The sadness is because it seems like my situation depends too much on what, if anything, my ADHD partner does to deal with the ADHD. I do not want my happiness to depend on someone else's actions which I cannot change.

I understand how you feel. 

I understand how you feel.  I felt the same way when I read the book.  I noticed so many of the patterns in my marriage to my ADD husband.  But I am tired of being the only one who seems to want to work toward changing things for the better.  He admits he has ADD and it causes problems in our relationship, but he has yet to follow through on treatment.  I get tired of the excuse of that's "just how he is" and "he is doing the best that he can".  Sometimes I just want to get in my car and start driving.  I do love him very much though and the responsibility of our two children keeps me from doing that.