I grew up knowing I have ADHD. Fortunately I had teacher who recognized it and I got the accommodations I needed and have managed to be somewhat effective in life using behavior modification. I am not medicated because I tend to not do well with the side effects. I have also been fortunate enough to work in Education, which has given me more opportunity to learn about ADHD. I believe my boyfriend has it severely he has some stung symptoms and a very negative outlook on life because of peoples reaction to him over the years.
I am at point that I would like to move forward but he cannot think past day to day. Although we have talked about getting married and looked at rings it always ends up in disappointment because he can't follow through or is not there even thought he wants to be. Lately our discussions turn into a large series of” you don't understand” or other things. What’s funny is we both understand more than the other thinks. Anyways...my over anxiousness and his diffusely planning ahead are really challenging for us. He often goes Un-responsive or says he can’t process things. I talk too much and get really hung up on things. The marriage thing is not the only reason for concern. He will not respond to me in a timely manner like when it is time to decide what to do when our lease is up, or when we can use those tickets I earned before they expire or anything like that..He fall asleep alot (I suspect because he keeps himself under so much control all day) I get anxious easily so being the opposite end of the symptom spectrum is sometimes a challenge...
I love him so much and really want us to work...would counseling and medication help on both ends. I am so self-conscious about my personality as it is. So if it would make me calmer less talkative that would be huge plus. We actually both will avoid social situations on some level. He and I have been eachothers best friend long before the dating and living together happened because we feel each is the only one who gets the other (unless the other is causing the stress)
What Can I do to be more effective...I do not want to give up on us. He is my best friend in the whole world. I have the most fun with him and he is absolutely the love of my life... I try to be patient (because that is what I would want) I'm thinking we should see one of those counselors who help the individuals and also the couple because then he know all situation in and out and can help on more level than it we had 3 different ones....Can 2 pople with simular learning disabilties and different coping stragies have a happily ever after??