YYYZ? Ellamenno? Someone?
I'm seeing instances of procrastination that are driving me nuts! I'm looking to understand it. I don't think there is a way to fix it, if he's not interested.
Two examples in the last weekend:
He is supposed to be at church early for choir practice. He doesn't tell me that, and doesn't get out out bed (although he is awake). Then I find out he has his mother's debit card, and he's supposed to give it back to her, but he has no idea where his wallet is. He finally gives up and leaves, 10 minutes late. He's in the choir, so he can't just sneak in the back. Why didn't he leave on time, why didn't he remember where his wallet is, why didn't he tell me he had this vital item, that isn't his, so I could look for it if he couldn't remember where he left it?
Trash in our neighborhood gets picked up on Friday. He's not working, so he's not getting up early enough in the morning. WHY won't he put it out the night before? He says "I'll get up and get it in the morning," but refuses to set the alarm clock, so of course, he doesn't. One of our cans doesn't get emptied. What is he saving by waiting until morning instead of doing it when it won't make him get up in the morning?
He's not interested in changing/improving this behavior. As I sit here with no food in my house because he lost his job for this kind of crap, I have to wonder: what is the advantage to him of procrastinating on things he knows he must do? Note that these are actual refusals to do things when they must be done, not getting distracted and "forgetting." He is taking medication but I'm not sure it's working.
I'm looking for any explanation of WHY he wants to be that way! I know I can't change him and I'm never going to have an acceptable quality of life as long as I live with someone who chooses not to do the things he knows he has to do, like work.