I would love to know how many other wives of ADHD husbands have found that they have a persistent cannabis habit - that does not escalate into drug addiction, but that probably makes their ADHD symptoms worse? I was terribly naive about this as well, believing him when he promised to give up when we got married, and then when I noticed he was sitting at home smoking instead of getting a job, when the first baby was born. Of course he did not, but sort of learned to hide it from me. I also always wanted to believe his promises. I think now that he was stoned all the time, and I don't know what he is like not stoned. I read on another site that cannabis is by far the most common form of self medication for ADHD, leading to all kinds of other problems. I now realise that he 'cared for' our youngest son while stoned a lot of the time, not surprising he let him go to a large public park alone aged 9, without even a telephone on several occasions after I left him. I was intent on being decent and honourable about making sure youngest saw his father - luckily I found out about this behaviour and was so shocked I did not even get angry, but managed to put a stop to it.