Can't Take it Anymore!


I'm thinking of renting a hotel room for a week just to get away from it all.  The lack of sleep because of his hyperactivity, the total and complete clutter and mess around the whole house.  I hate what this marriage has done to me in the past two years.... I sunk to my lowest last night.  He made me so angry.  We were fighting and he was pissed off so he said lets just shut off the light and go to sleep.  So I asked him to put my Bible on the coffee stand, he "tossed" it halfway across the room, and my favorite book, my Bible smashed against the wall!!! I freaked out.  I mean I really freaked, more than I ever have in my life.  I was in hysterics.  His brother told me that my husband also has a sadistic side, he likes to hurt those he loves when hes angry and i think that was one demonstration. I never had anyone ever do something so disrespectful of me.  I went into a crying rage and instead of letting me go, which I told him to he held onto me close yelling at me to calm down!  I mean wtf, i told him several times to let me go!  and he wouldn't so I shoved him, he again held onto me and wouldnt let me go so I bit his arm!  I mean this is insane.  Im a darn introvert who has never acted or been pushed to this extreem before.  Im scared of feeling this way.  I feel so angry.  BTW, my husband was diagnosed with adult ADHD last week and they said it would take 3 weeks before he could have an appointment with a nurse to get medicine!  Wtf, ive told them we are at a crisis stage.  Anyways, I really feel I need to get away, i dont have any relatives here, but maybe I can swing the cost of a hotel room. I just cant take this anymore and I dont like what its doing to me, but I am a Christian and obviously I dont want to rush into a divorce even if im miserable.  Anyways, thanks for listening, this forum has been so supportive.