Another football season has begun, and another few months of weekend hell. This early afternoon we were at a group function and someone had a football game on. The teams weren't even any of H's favorite teams....He has one big favorite and a few other favorites. He started screaming at some of the penalty calls, the bad throws, you name it. Then later this afternoon, one of his favorite teams was playing and it was actually scary to be around him. He threw the remote in anger . So, before half-time even came, I left the room and stayed in our bedroom....which made him angrier because he wants me there with him, and because my leaving "makes him feel bad" because it points out that he's a poor sport.
I just told him that I won't watch any games with him this season. Although I enjoy the actual games, even the ones that are "sure wins" will anger H if someone makes a mistake.
A couple years ago, the police came because he became so verbally abusive and scary when he thought his team was losing (in the end, they won). When I tried to leave, H ran after me screaming, so the neighbors called the police. When the police got there, H was very angry and the police told him that they were going to take him to a hotel for the night ....they didn't want him driving because he had been drinking.
Tonight, he wasn't drinking as far as I know.
I try to figure out why he is this way about sports...including the ones that he plays. He's a horrible loser. His best friend (who died in a tragic accident) used to play him in tennis but H would get so angry when he lost, it was no longer fun for this friend. H is like a worse version of John McEnroe.
There are two things I've observed:
1) The perfection expectation: He expects all players, coaches, and refs to be perfect. When they fall short of that expectation, he gets angry. I'm not talking about the typical, "oh shit" when someone drops the ball. I'm talking about becoming extremely angry in a way that observers notice and become nervous.
2) Somehow these teams' performances are a reflection of him. If they do poorly, then somehow he "looks badly," too. I know that sounds crazy, but it does seem that way.
Anyone else experience this?