I love my husband, I really do. He is a great guy and for the most part I love our life together.
But I'm at a loss right now as to handle his career unemployment and the way he views himself with grace.
I work from home and make a very good living. He handles the household stuff. It works pretty well.
Lately he's been talking about getting a job (he's been unemployed most of his life), and he was up for a minimum wage position that had a chance to work into something bigger. He turned it down because it conflicted with all the kid stuff. Okay, I get that. Totally understandable.
Then he started getting down on himself, but at the same time, giving himself a lot of false pride. For example, he wants to run for city council. He has zero political experience, has never volunteered on any city boards, and the extent of his experience is that he knows a lot of people and talks a lot. He's also got a psychiatrist appointment (FINALLY) in a couple weeks for diagnosing ADD and possibly a few other things; he looked at me and said "I can diagnose myself right now. And I know most people would thing I'm just being arrogant, but that doesn't matter. The reason my career is not where it should be is 100% other people. If they would just do what I tell them to do I would be the CEO of Microsoft." I'm not making this up, he really does say this and lots more in this vein all the time.
He also started a home PC repair business several years ago; started by talking about it, then asking me to build a web presense, then promptly dumping it. He gets people calling for help probably once or twice a month (which I was unaware of), in fact, just had someone call in front of me. He TURNED THE BUSINESS DOWN, on the phone, and when I (in shock) asked him why he did that, he said that he was only interested in helping Fortune 500 companies.
I didn't even know this was happening, and I was so angry that he turned the people down that I had to walk away. Then he starts talking about how he "doesn't want to waste his time with home users". This from a man who has been unemployed most of his life, a business opportunity literally falls into his lap, and he's got the nerve to turn it down.
Is this more than ADD? Or is this full-on mental illness? Like I said, I love him and most of the time we do great together. But this constant refusal to face reality is honestly shocking to me. I want to know how I can handle it gracefully without, you know, boot-kicking him. :)