This is my first post, I was going to go through everything but I got a bit over whelmed so I have decided to approach this in parts.
Firstly a quick opener about me and the situation. :)
I've been with my ADHD partner for 5 years. Living together for about 3 years. I always knew our relationship was different so to speak, I found myself having to approach arguments, Disagreements, Etc in a different way than I would with anyone else and trying to find the best way/time to communicate and get my point across.
It's only recently I've realised these communication problems as well as other things could be down to his ADHD. I'm not blaming it for all of our relationship problems but it most certainly affects the way they're handled. I realised this when I was researching how to get help living with an angry partner. I was actually convinced I was in an emotionally abusive relationship until I came across this site and I must say it's kind of a relief knowing there could be a reason and it can be managed.
I never thought the ADHD could be a factor because when my Fiance told me about it I didn't know enough and just took his word that he had it managed, But he hasn't been on any sort of medication or counseling since he was a very young child. After reading a lot of the forums I can relate to so much! I've found myself thinking "You're describing my life!" and after getting some answers from these I tried to communicate this to him which brings me to the first subject I want to discuss - Denial.
He is hell bent on the fact no one can help him, He doesn't need medication or counseling and "He is just the way he is" He seems to think things will never change, that they have to change or that he even wants them to!
So my question is; Where do I go from here?
I feel like I've pretty much hit a brick wall and have no idea how to get him to see things can't carry on the way they are. I deserve to be happy as well. I love him dearly but how can we move forward as a couple if he refuses to see any fault, Never mind get help.
This is something I want us to do together, I understand he may need help managing this but I also need to be more educated on the subject and we both need to work together to learn how to communicate better. He just needs to realise that first or we'll just continue to go around in the same pattern, Over and over again....