Divorce, separation, desperation

I am 30 with a one year old, my husband has adhd recently on meds and diagnosed. I am struggling, I am now back to work, I have a young baby and I don't see any progress. My husband thinks the pills are his way of changing and making an effort when there are so many other things that need to be addressed for our marriage to succeed. He makes impulsive decisions, I am always the responsible one picking up the pieces and I'm burning out especially when I want to focus on caring for my baby not my husband. He thinks I'm a raging bitch and always pointing how his flaws. I don't know what to do he lacks insight so if I don't bring things up he doesn't even know they are a problem but if I bring them up he gets pissed. We're at a cross roads. I don't know how to get through to him, I know he loves me and loves our son but I can't live like this anymore. We are planning to separate but I am so upset and mad and sad that my son is going to have to go through this I don't have anyone to talk to about divorce and separation with a one year old, I feel so lost and unsure how to protect my self, and my son from the sadness and confusion. I want to just fake it and pretend everything is fine so I don't have to be away from my son or deal with the consequences of a separation or divorce like our house, jobs finances, it's so overwhelming, any advice?