Sorry, this question is so stupid. I'm ashamed already.
Does love ever return?
The last couple of years with my severe ADD husband have been very hard. Today I feel I'm walking in ruins at home. I look at my breakfast china and remember when we bought it together excitedly many years ago, building a home. We seem to have failed.
Any doctor would suggest I take anti-depressants, as they have on several occasions. I guess I could. But I'm afraid that would cloud judgment. I'm not joyless. It's just my marriage pulls me down.
I've felt love during the process of diagnosis and I've tried very hard to participate in turning our situation around since then. But now, 19 months in, I haven't felt loving for a long time.
Progress might be there, but I've lost hope. There is no story. There is no functioning future in sight. He doesn't seem to be able to work. He's perpetually ill. He's always tired. He cannot plan, imagine, dream, prioritize. He's only in his early forties. We have three schoolchildren.
I guess I'm hoping for something to happen, since I don't seem to be able to change anything by shifting attitudes, trying new angles, making up, creating boundaries, starting over. I've used all the tools in my box.
I guess I'm hoping for a miracle.
Does love return?
I'm so terribly sad today.