My husband of 15 years was diagnosed with ADHD two years ago. We have been to counseling for about a year, but continue to have the same issues. The latest issue is his expectations of me. Last night, he approached me at 11:30 at night,when I was already in bed and asked me if he could use my car at 8:00 am the next day for a meeting that he had. His car was being repaired and he forgot to call the mechanic to see if it would be ready in the morning. Suddenly he wanted it to be my problem. I told him that he could not use my car because I had to take our kids to soccer at 9:00 (which he already knew about). He talked to a friend of ours and said she could take the kids and I to and from soccer while he had my car. I still said no because this is an ongoing issue. I'm sorry if it sounds harsh, but his lack of planning is NOT my emergency. I have to put responsibility onto him. Later, I found out that he road his bike 62 miles (round trip) to get to his meeting. I still did not feel bad. Instead, I felt like finally he is learning to take responsibility. I will NOT enable him, nor do I feel like I should be involved if it's not an emergency. Of course I want to help him, but I've dealt with this situation way too often, where he doesn't plan ahead and suddenly, it's my problem. Well not any more!!!!! This goes for paying taxes too. For years he has not paid his taxes and does not have deductions taken out of his UNEMPLOYMENT checks. I have been the one paying all the bills and paying his unpaid taxes because we are married and it would result in a lein against our mortgage (which is in my name). This year, I told him that he needed to contribute to what he owes and if he seeks unemployment, he needs to have taxes taken out. I said I cannot live like this anymore, nor will I live like this anymore!!!! I am serious. I don't know if I am getting older and bolder or just sick of all the responsibility. I know I can stand on my own and not afraid to. I will not enable anymore!!! Feeling fed up and sick of it all! He had the guts to say to me that I only help out when it's convenient for me. NOOOO!! I am more than happy to help if it's an emergency, but again, his lack of planning is NOT my emergency.