My google searches, mostly ADHD unrelated, seem to always lead me to this site so I just joined. My husband is absolutely impossible to communicate with, especially during an argument. He has not been diagnosed with adhd but I am almost 100% positive he would be if we pursued counseling. We desperately need it.
I am married to a very moody man. The attitude he gives me when I ask even the slightest thing of him is unbearable to me. Eye rolling, no eye contact, and always seems to take out his stress on me. He does not treat other people this way, although his relationships with others do have their own issues - forgetfulness, poor communication, little things that people seem to laugh off as "just him". This morning he was on his laptop working and I asked when we could set aside 30 minutes to discuss scheduling for this week - we have a 1 year old and are both working so need to arrange childcare. I thought this would be a good approach since earlier in the morning he basically ignored my questions about scheduling. It did not go over well. Then as I was watching our son, I asked if he could watch him for 10 minutes so I could finish a task I started. He came back with a loud sigh and eye roll then proceeded to belittle the work I was doing. I admit that I got angry, maybe disproportionately angry and yelled that he can't treat me that way.
I told him that the eye rolling makes me feel very disrespected and of course I cried. That never is the right answer but I can't help it. He simply cannot deal with any kind of emotion from me, tells me I'm the one acting immaturely and "who cares if I roll my eyes" "get over it", irrationally leaves the room, etc., all with anger apparently brought on by MY outburst. So I have to apologize. I always do, he never does.
Honestly I am so tired of trying to hold it together when my feelings are so constantly disregarded. I dream about the day we can have a normal adult conversation and actually work through things that matter in a marriage. Is this an ADHD sign? Or simply the dynamic of our relationship? I know we need counseling, unfortunately our insurance will not cover anything. I'm working on options.