My H has a focus on garbage. He gets enraged every Saturday at me because he feels like I don't process the "throw aways" correctly. He literally sits on the floor of the kitchen with the 2 garbage bags and sorts, rips labels off glass containers, shreds, and categorizies every fine piece for over 30 minutes. He is always FUMING at me while he does this because I don't do this.
I have a choice. I can do it his way (which to me seems out of proportion of time spent for trash) or..
I can let it be and let him have the ownership of the garbage duty. As it is, every Saturday he steams and cusses and slams thing. He cannot talk about it. He is a hoarder. He tells me I must re-use Saran Wrap and when he takes it off a dish from the fridge, he folds it and puts it in a drawer.
Do I teach him that if he cusses at me that I will do things his way? Or do I keep my dignity and go about my own business of cleaning the rest of the house?
Do I spend my time categorizing the trash to keep the peace? Shall I take my own trash out clandistinely and bring my trash to the county dump myself...thereby taking the chore away from him? Do I just endure the slamming and hating?
I know there is no correct answer. I know that consistancy is the best policy since change upsets him. But the slamming and cussing upsets me.
There is no talking about this. He has been stonewalling me for months. I refuse to start a discussion about it because it always starts a fight. My muscles are sore from tensing up and stuffing everything and knowing things are not good.
Just sharing because I need to share this morning. I can't know if he is having personal problems in his head or if he is so furious with me. He won't talk.