I just wanted to share that my wife has (finally) heard me that we need help, and we just started working with someone who has experience working woth couples where one of the partners has ADHD. I feel like one of the lucky ones!
I don't expect it to be a miracle cure, but I really think it is going to help. My wife only agreed to participate because I told her that I feared that if we didn't get help that our marriage would not last, and that if that happened, it would be her fault for not agreeing to address the ADHD issues. This morning, she commented to me "I think you were right that we needed help." Thank you!
I now have a question about sustained effort. I have read postings on this site about people with ADHD agreeing to work on ADHD issues, only to revert to their "old" behaviors after the hyperfocus wears off, or who for other reasons, end up not dealing with their ADHD behaviors anymore. Any advice on what I should look for to recognize that it might be starting to happen with my wife, and what I might say to her if it does? (I was never a girl scout but I definitely believe in the motto "Be prepared.")
How do I help make sure my wife continues in "maintenance mode" - to quote Awren, and what does that even look like?