I've never had a problem letting my husband know what I need and why: "The laundry has to be picked up from the laundry room floor before they deliver the new washer", "I can't do the laundry because I fell in the laundry room, and I have not one pair of clean underwear, so I need you to do laundry", "because you lost your job, I can't get my hypertension meds and I'm going to have another stroke", etc. I often cry when I beg and plead with him to do some small task I can't do. He ignores me. I always said it can't be because he's putting it in the "not now" because I am there crying and begging him to meet the particular need.
He admitted to me tonight that it's because I get so upset when a need is not met. So what am I to do? If I just say matter-of-factly "The laundry needs to be done" it will go into the "not now." If I tell him "I can't go to work tomorrow unless you do the laundry tonight" and cry, he'll know I want him to do it, but he won't because he doesn't want me to be "emotional." So what do I do to get my needs met? Does anyone else have this dynamic?