My bf texted me Saturday morning that he drove up to his family's lake house 8 hours away and would not be helping me move the next day. He was acting distant for a couple days before. I have known him for 8 years and we have been together for over 3. I just helped him move last month, and I just moved to the same town he's in. Thank God my uncle is such a great person because otherwise it would have been me and my dad. Bf wouldn't pick up the phone when he texted me because he was 'in the car with his family.' He said he would call later and didn't. My mom, who couldn't help because she had to care for my disabled brother, asked bf to contact her. He apologized to her for not calling yet, but never did.
When he was being distant I said I was concerned. First he said he was really busy at work; then he said he was feeling unhappy and didn't feel like talking; finally he said he's been unhappy with our communication lately. I don't know what to make of this. On the most basic level, I would think he would keep his commitment of helping me move, especially after one of his brothers didn't help him move because he didn't feel like it. My bf had helped him with a few big moves, but the brother just didn't feel like helping him. Bf's other brother offered a few weeks ago to help me move. I asked bf this week if he was coming; bf said he didn't think so because his brother decided to go to the lake. I asked why it didn't seem to bother him that his brother looked me in the eye and offered to help and then changed his mind. Bf ignored the question.
I am writing this only phone since I don't have internet at my new apt yet, so that's why the post is so choppy. I asked bf, so you drop this on me and won't pick up your phone because you are on vacation? And he said 'yeah.' A few nights before we went to our Homebrew club meeting and signed up for a competition in October.. We were getting along fine and everything was normal as far as I knew. He even tucked me in the next morning when he left for work. The only tension all week was a couple of snide comments I made out of stress, which Im not proud of, about whether he likes someone he works with. I know it's immature of me, but sometimes he's hard to trust and I say the wrong thing. I know I'm not responsible for his behavior though, and I need a few opinions. He has literally run away from me multiple times before when he can't regulate his own stress. Recently I actually told him it was okay that he was late to pick me up for something, that we could still go but I thought we'd miss the part I wanted to attend. He blamed our missing it on my not sprinting outside when he arrived. He screamed at me on the phone and said he was driving away. I hadn't raised my voice at all and was trying to be flexible, but maybe because I didn't do what he wanted, he flipped. Anyway, I am sad and shocked right now. I don't know what to do.