My partner has ADHD and he is recently going through a rough period with his work, particularly with the uncertainty of losing his job as well as being in the early stages of his career in his field. We've had a couple of heated conversations where he says that he is not being seen by me and that I don't understand what he's going through. He sees my day-to-day and ends up comparing his situation to mine, as well as his situations to other "careers". I'm generally very patient with him, especially when he has manic episodes due to the amount of stress he's on, but in general, he almost doesn't want to hear what I have to say. I try to be encouraging and I genuinely believe in him, but no matter what I say, I end up being the one told that I don't understand and will never understand what he's going through. For some background, we've been together for almost two years (he's in his early 30s and I'm 26), he's had ADHD since he was a child and he takes a pill in the morning and a pill to fall asleep at night, he has bi-weekly therapy sessions (I am sometimes with him in his sessions and they generally only help in the moment), and at times of very high stress - he ends up having to drink alcohol to take away his present pain.
I don't necessarily know how to frame my problem other than that I don't know what else I can do to be any more supportive than I already am. I listen and I generally am very objective when communicating to him, but any type of actionable comment or advice I give him will backfire and he will then use his go-to reply of "you don't understand", which does hurt me a bit, but I get it. I see myself as a generally stoic person, while he is pretty much the opposite and can get very emotional. I do love him, so I try to educate myself on ADHD and how to love him, but sometimes it can get hard and I feel like giving up.
If you have any comments, questions, or advise, do let me know.