Help: Mental health support, burnt out

I wanted other non-ADHD partner views on whether their mental health has been significantly impacted by their ADHD partner?

Ive been with my partner (now separated) for 18years. He had undiagnosed ADHD until 3months ago. The interrupting, blameshifting, forgetfulness, impulsivity, wreckless behaviour etc has had a significant impact on me. I feel i altered my reality to justify behaviour that shouldnt have been justified. I took on the ADHD reality of: its a joke, theres no intent, im not telling you youre wrong (despite most things i say he has an opposing view, tells me "thats not it", "actually its this", "i dont think so"). This meant i downplayed everything. I was in denial for 10years. Now i feel awake and im devastated. 

Ive had anxiety, denial, depression and possibly PTSD. Has anyone felt this or essentially lost themselves or ignored their gut feelings?