Hi, my name is Cathryn, and my husband has ADD.

Why do I feel like I'm the one with the problem here? lol.  Ok guys, I'm a newbie here.  I found out a few days ago that my husband of 5 years has ADD.  At first I was happy.  I thought, there's a reason he is the way he is.  Now, for some reason, I'm scared to death.  What if he doesn't change?  I know that's not a good mindset to have, I need to believe he'll get better.  But what if I will always feel alone, worthless, overwhelmed, desperate for companionship?  I have been overjoyed to find this website and learn of others going through the exact same thing as I.  I admit I'm depressed at seeing how many of these marriages end in divorce.  I'm a stay at home mom to 2 young children.  May I ask a few questions?

Are ADDers aware of the negative affects they have on loved ones?  My husband seems completely oblivious depsite my calmly and lovingly telling him how I feel.

Will I pretty much always have to be his mother?  Overseeing everything?  Taking care of everything myself?  Cleaning up after him constantly?  He doesn't help me around the house, this is almost too much, I want more kids, but with him I already have 3 kids to take care of. 

He spends money constantly, money we sometimes don't have.  I can't trust him with our financial future, depsite me being the one handling the finances.  Is this normal?  It scares me to death that b/c of him, we may never be financially secure with a good savings, etc. 


Thanks yall, I know I'll have more questions, I'm just so overwhelmed right now, and as I've said many times-scared.  We don't take marriage lightly, I don't want divorce to be an option.