I was married to a person I cared deeply about and was in love with for many years. My marriage has now ended and I believe our problems for the most part were due to a lack of effort in getting help for my ADHD and depression. I never realized how this could affect a marriage until recently. I had a self-diagnosis yet never followed up with it. I have had some depression problems that I have been working on as well. Recently after formally testing off the charts with a psychiatrist did I realize how the deterioration was due in large part to the ADHD. I am grateful to know that the gray clouds for decades have been figured out. I am on medications and through self-help exercises, therapy, and meds everything makes sense and I now "get it". I am sad that I miss the one person I truly care about and the misery I put her through for years. I wish something could be done but forgiving and forgetting are two different issues. The divorce is final and she feels the scars will never heal. I want no one else. We are very amicable and children are involved. We see and talk everyday. I did not fight anything through the proceedings since I left her as I figured it to be less hard on the kids if there wasn't a long drawn out battle. I do not want to be back with her "for the kids". I just love her so much. Everyday life has now come down to a speed that I can manage if I was with her after realizing the many wrongs I did and the mental aspect of life is now clear. She is still in my heart through all of it. I hope somebody has advice on what to do. My love for her if anything has grown stronger. Thanks.