How can I get through to him????

So here we are again.  I just recently got Melissa's book The ADHD effect on Marriage.  First day we got it, the both of us read the first 7 pages.  Since then, I am the only one reading.  So far, I understand more now about ADHD, the descriptions, feelings, situations describe my husband and I to the "T".  I am not completely done with the book but so far I have been doing things differently as far as talking to my husband.  I decided to go ahead and stop the nagging and approach him in different ways.  Although this has put him in a happier mood, I am still here feeling the same, only not angry but sad.  I'm sad because my husband is not being treated due to the fact that he is in the Army and he will be chaptered out if they found out.  He has just about 3 years left until he gets out.

I just feel like I am accommodating him.  It seems as if I am the one that is sacrificing my feelings so that he can be in his "happy comfy zone".  I know that most of this is his ADHD and that he can't help it.  But how do I break him out of it and how can I get through to him without sounding like a pathetic nag???  This whole weekend went without fighting, but only because I can now see when the ADHD kicks in and identify it when it happens.  I have been letting it go.  He told me that he wants to read the book and work through this with me, but since its not "stimulating" enough for him, I guess he just doesn't do it.  He just says "I want to, I promise I will".  How do you talk to someone that is not being treated?  How do you get them to listen?

I dont' know what to do.