How Do You HANG ON?

My husband has ADD, takes multiple meds, sees a doctor twice a month ( for free.. Husband gave him stock in the company!)

He has been on meds for 10 years or so and seeing the therapist that long.  I see NO big changes.

We have no money for me to go to a therapist.

Husband is self employed and always on the verge of making it big.

I'm waiting. He has done well in the past but not in the last 3 years, plus we lost everything when the market crashed two years ago.

We've been married 34 years and have two grown married children.

He won't do anything around the house..ever. 

He used to take the dog for a morning walk.. all of 10 minutes.. but now has stopped that as I am not teaching school for the I can do it ( in his mind).


I left two years ago for two months... all would be different when I got back so he said.

It isn't .. obviously.

We are both 63 .     I am just the maid and mother. 

I have so little respect for him anymore that I would leave again but I have no money and teaching isnt enough to support me.

I am TRYING to hang on til some more money comes in and I can go to a therapist on my own and then with him.

BUT.. I don't know that I can keep this up!

He will not talk with me about anything as he hears everything I say as critical and mean.

Perhaps I am asking too much?

HELP.. Please!